What Do You Think...

[blueskiesbutterflies]

As in my last post, I talked about my little Columbia child who just moved to America and is having a hard time adjusting. I felt like such a failure with the child not eating nor drinking all day. She has been in my daycare for 2 weeks and has eating just a few times. I know we are talking about different cultures, but milk is milk right? Anyways, I can see she really wants something to eat and drink, but she just will not do it.

Today, my assistant and I did not hold her all day. I just felt it is unfair to the other children as well as to my little columbia child. So, I told her it was ok to cry if she wanted too. I did hold her several times and give her comfort and love and talked to her. I set on the rug with her and attempted to play with her. During nap, I did set with her till she fell asleep and when she woke up I was right beside her again. I do let her have her blanket all due because I feel she needs some sort of security during the day. I downloaded a spanish app and did try to talk to her about her crying. She did cry less today and did play for maybe 5 min. I know that isnt a long time, but at least she attempted to play.

Here is what I was thinking of doing, but I am not sure if I would make it worse on her or not. The way my daycare is set up, we use one very large room that is set up just for daycare. I do happen to have a room that my family isnt using that is beside the daycare bathroom. I was thinking of setting this room up as a mini version of what I have and letting my assistant attend to the Columbia child in there one on one. She would have her own table, chairs, toys, and quiet from the other children.
I am torn in both directions with doing this becuase I guess it would be considered being isolated from the other kids. But, when the others laugh, yell, scream, sing, cry etc..it makes my columbia child upset. She cries most of the day, which upsets the other kids as well. I thought I could leave the door open and she could join us when she wanted due to no baby gate being in place.

Does this sound like a bad idea?:confused:

[Thriftylady]

I really wish I had answers for you. I am having severe issues with my grandson, because he is 10 months old and spoiled. Every time he whines they pick him up. He is only here once every couple of weeks and screams the whole time because I am not about to pick him up and toss him in the air, spin him around, bounce him whatever every time he whines, so he screams at me the whole time he is here. He cried for over 2 hours tonight before he went to sleep, and will likely sleep till 4 am or so. I so want to tell him they have to bring him three times a week (even if just for a few hours). Just so he can learn that not everyone will act like his parents. But if they don't follow through and do that, they will never find a full time daycare provider.

[Mom o Col]

I'm wondering did she move here with her birth family or was this an adoption? Either way this must be so traumatic for her. I understand your concern. She is blessed to have you caring for her and trying so hard to help her get comfortable. Could her parents offer some suggestions for easing her into her new situation? Have you researched ideas online? I'd be concerned about how these difficulties are going to effect her future yet I suppose it happens every day.

[daycare]

I have worked with a lot of ESL kids...

I call it the stray cat theory...

lets say you find a stray kitten...you want to pick it up, but it runs and hides in the bushes....you do this many times, but it won't come to you. YOu decide you will bribe it with food. so you fill a bowl and leave it out.

the kitten won't come near it until you are out of sight.

finally from your porch window, you can see the kitten eating the food. wtih tons of time and patience you do all you can to get this kitten to trust you. now you can open your front door and sit there and watch the kitten eat. it still won't come to you, but it does not mind that you are there.

One day you put food in your hand and hold it out. it takes days and days until finally one day down the road the kitten comes up to you and eats out of your hand.

eventually over time, with consistency and tons of patience the kitten learns that you won't hurt them and that you are where the food comes from. you get to pick it up and hold it and maybe even sneak in a few snuggles.

ESL kids are just like this.

I would get pictures of parents and family to make a book, have the parents do it, have them write mom and dad on their pics.

I would get pic cards of the bathroom, food, and etc.

they say it takes 21+times of something happening consistently to make it a new habit. It will take her some time. she talk to her very slowly. give her words to use.

show her things and say them slowly. play a game. hide something in a bag like a pair of shoes.... say look Mary, show her the bag and then say you want to see what's inside the bag. Pull out the shoes and slowly say sshhhhh ooooooeeeesss. then put them on her. Keep pointing and saying shoes over and over.

start with very very easy things first. I would also hold her hand a lot, either you or your assistant.

[Mom o Col]

I have worked with a lot of ESL kids...

I call it the stray cat theory...

lets say you find a stray kitten...you want to pick it up, but it runs and hides in the bushes....you do this many times, but it won't come to you. YOu decide you will bribe it with food. so you fill a bowl and leave it out.

the kitten won't come near it until you are out of sight.

finally from your porch window, you can see the kitten eating the food. wtih tons of time and patience you do all you can to get this kitten to trust you. now you can open your front door and sit there and watch the kitten eat. it still won't come to you, but it does not mind that you are there.

One day you put food in your hand and hold it out. it takes days and days until finally one day down the road the kitten comes up to you and eats out of your hand.

eventually over time, with consistency and tons of patience the kitten learns that you won't hurt them and that you are where the food comes from. you get to pick it up and hold it and maybe even sneak in a few snuggles.

ESL kids are just like this.

I would get pictures of parents and family to make a book, have the parents do it, have them write mom and dad on their pics.

I would get pic cards of the bathroom, food, and etc.

they say it takes 21+times of something happening consistently to make it a new habit. It will take her some time. she talk to her very slowly. give her words to use.

show her things and say them slowly. play a game. hide something in a bag like a pair of shoes.... say look Mary, show her the bag and then say you want to see what's inside the bag. Pull out the shoes and slowly say sshhhhh ooooooeeeesss. then put them on her. Keep pointing and saying shoes over and over.

start with very very easy things first. I would also hold her hand a lot, either you or your assistant.

Awesome ideas!!!!

[NightOwl]

I love daycare's suggestions.

The separate room? Idk... The first thing I think of is that this would prolong her integration into your program. In the other hand, it may help her to take baby steps into your program. I'm just not sure.

If it was me, I would give it a few more days. Those little moments of briefly playing today were actually a big step. That's progress!

[AmyKidsCo]

I had a Chinese girl for a month while her mom visited China. She was 2 and didn't speak English at all. It took almost the whole month for her to start feeling comfortable, then she was gone. Her grandma brought lunch for her every day, which I served along with the food the other children were eating. Some days she ate her food, some days my food, some days nothing at all. It just takes time and love.

[Heidi]

Daycare's suggestion's are great.

Could her parents maybe bring some food from their culture, prepared, for all the children to try? You could reimburse them for the cost.

Then, you can make a big deal out of how she brought whatever to share for lunch. Yumm!

I don't know how old your group is, but how about putting together a bulletin board of Columbian pictures. Places, people, scenery, foods. Anything that will seem a bit familiar with her.

Here are some picture calendar/clues I found. Make it a game for everyone. If you print the word for each one under the picture, it could be a literacy activity. If these don't work, I'm sure you can make some easily.

http://thebridgeuniversity.com/free-kids-printables/free-printable-chore-cards-74841/

I would not separate her, other than giving her a comfy spot to retreat to if she's overwhelmed.

How about it everyone brings a family picture Monday? Then, have a poster ready to stick them all on, and you have another activity. Now, EVERYONE has a mommi and a boppi (or whatever their slang is). It helps build camaraderie. They're leaving their parents behind as well, after all.

[Heidi]

Dang, I just looked up Columbian culture "images". The food looks amazing. When can I come try some?

[Heidi]

As in my last post, I talked about my little Columbia child who just moved to America and is having a hard time adjusting. I felt like such a failure with the child not eating nor drinking all day. She has been in my daycare for 2 weeks and has eating just a few times. I know we are talking about different cultures, but milk is milk right? Anyways, I can see she really wants something to eat and drink, but she just will not do it.

Today, my assistant and I did not hold her all day. I just felt it is unfair to the other children as well as to my little columbia child. So, I told her it was ok to cry if she wanted too. I did hold her several times and give her comfort and love and talked to her. I set on the rug with her and attempted to play with her. During nap, I did set with her till she fell asleep and when she woke up I was right beside her again. I do let her have her blanket all due because I feel she needs some sort of security during the day. I downloaded a spanish app and did try to talk to her about her crying. She did cry less today and did play for maybe 5 min. I know that isnt a long time, but at least she attempted to play.

Here is what I was thinking of doing, but I am not sure if I would make it worse on her or not. The way my daycare is set up, we use one very large room that is set up just for daycare. I do happen to have a room that my family isnt using that is beside the daycare bathroom. I was thinking of setting this room up as a mini version of what I have and letting my assistant attend to the Columbia child in there one on one. She would have her own table, chairs, toys, and quiet from the other children.
I am torn in both directions with doing this becuase I guess it would be considered being isolated from the other kids. But, when the others laugh, yell, scream, sing, cry etc..it makes my columbia child upset. She cries most of the day, which upsets the other kids as well. I thought I could leave the door open and she could join us when she wanted due to no baby gate being in place.

Does this sound like a bad idea?:confused:

Nice place! I love the birdies!

[BrooklynM]

I have worked with a lot of ESL kids...

I call it the stray cat theory...

lets say you find a stray kitten...you want to pick it up, but it runs and hides in the bushes....you do this many times, but it won't come to you. YOu decide you will bribe it with food. so you fill a bowl and leave it out.

the kitten won't come near it until you are out of sight.

finally from your porch window, you can see the kitten eating the food. wtih tons of time and patience you do all you can to get this kitten to trust you. now you can open your front door and sit there and watch the kitten eat. it still won't come to you, but it does not mind that you are there.

One day you put food in your hand and hold it out. it takes days and days until finally one day down the road the kitten comes up to you and eats out of your hand.

eventually over time, with consistency and tons of patience the kitten learns that you won't hurt them and that you are where the food comes from. you get to pick it up and hold it and maybe even sneak in a few snuggles.

ESL kids are just like this.

I would get pictures of parents and family to make a book, have the parents do it, have them write mom and dad on their pics.

I would get pic cards of the bathroom, food, and etc.

they say it takes 21+times of something happening consistently to make it a new habit. It will take her some time. she talk to her very slowly. give her words to use.

show her things and say them slowly. play a game. hide something in a bag like a pair of shoes.... say look Mary, show her the bag and then say you want to see what's inside the bag. Pull out the shoes and slowly say sshhhhh ooooooeeeesss. then put them on her. Keep pointing and saying shoes over and over.

start with very very easy things first. I would also hold her hand a lot, either you or your assistant.

This is wonderful advice!