Are all new dc parents like this?

[drseuss]

I think more parents are like this now than are not. I have one mom who teaches so she is home all summer. She still drives 30 miles each way twice a day to bring the baby here, goback home and do whatever, and pick him up. Unreal. That's 120 miles. :confused:

[KiddieCahoots]

It's the act that gets us all bent!
Why act like you miss your child desperately, then leave them with us all day out of convenience?
Yay.....us daycare providers, we have no idea what some parents are up to, and all fell off the turnip truck yesterday! ....::.............

Had a mom once that left her baby with me while she vacationed for a week with her family at the beach. Of course she conveniently told me on Friday, the last day of her vacation. Not that I could've told her she couldn't do that, but she obviously knew enough herself that people wouldn't agree with her decision to tell me on Friday.

I'm glad that I chose to be a different type of parent to my children.

[hsdcmama]

That part, I WOULD have an issue with but because it affects ME.

I change what things bother me and the rest, I try to leave alone because I can't do anything about it so why take on the extra stress...kwim?

Agreed. I have contracted hours with each family, with late fees in place if the kids are not picked up on time (unless the parents have made previous arrangements with me). I also charge by the day, not by the hour, and parents must pay for their contracted days whether their child attends or not. So I tell them if their child is contracted to come on X day and the parent happens to have a day off, go ahead and bring Little Johnny over to play, you are paying for it either way!

[nannyde]

When I first started, this would bother me also, but quickly learned that if I worried about what all if these parents were doing all day, I would drive myself insane. So I realized, it really doesn't matter. As long as they are dropped off/picked up at their contracted times I didn't care. If they need a little extra time for a meeting or an appointment they ask ahead of time and I am fine with it. Now if it became a habit, I would say something.

When I worked outside of the home I couldn't wait to have a day off to spend with my son. When my daughter was born my husband worked days and I worked evenings to limit childcare. But to each their own. BC is absolutely right. Every parent is different and every families situation is different.

I think the problem is that although some families are different in this type of parenting, the truth is that the vast majority BY FAR are the same. I would guess that the percentage of parents who would choose time with their child over using daycare when the price is the same is about five... maybe ten percent.

I think most parents who don't use max hours have a time or money deal that makes it so that it's more convenient or less expensive in gas or wear and tear on the car for them to pick up before they have to.

All things being equal the percentage of parents who choose time with their kid when they could have the child in care is a very small percentage imho

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Parents that value time with their children don't fuss about it when they have an option not to and actually be with their child. They find ways to make it happen. I pretend like I don't hear them when they say that and leave their child with me because I don't like to pat people's read ends to make them feel good about themselves.

If I said something, it would be, "Oh, little Bobby would love to spend the day with you as well. I am sure he will be SO STOKED to do that on your next day off instead of daycare!!!" I have done that before. Never heard another peep from that parent. But, I really just don't want to engage in that conversation so I don't these days. I become so busy with doing something else when they start that.

[GabsKids]

I think the problem is that although some families are different in this type of parenting, the truth is that the vast majority BY FAR are the same. I would guess that the percentage of parents who would choose time with their child over using daycare when the price is the same is about five... maybe ten percent.

I think most parents who don't use max hours have a time or money deal that makes it so that it's more convenient or less expensive in gas or wear and tear on the car for them to pick up before they have to.

All things being equal the percentage of parents who choose time with their kid when they could have the child in care is a very small percentage imho

Yes, that is very true. When I first started my policy was parents only had to pay when their child attended. Meaning if the child was sick or parents had off, and they kept their child home, they didn't have to pay. For some it was great. They very rarely were absent. For others, it was a nightmare. I had full time kids missing at least 3-5 days per month and I didn't get paid for those days. So I implemented you pay your contracted days whether your child is here or not. Does that influence their decision to bring their child even if they are off? Yes, for most I think it does. They are thinking, I paid, so they are going.

It is sad to me, that just because they paid that day, that they don't spend it with their child. Or that they keep them at daycare 10+ hours per day when they really don't have to. But there is not much I can control about how they parent their kids.

[preschoolteacher]

I had a mom who would spend 20 minutes dragging out drop-off with her whining child. The kid came on days Mom wasn't working. She'd tell me she was off to the movies or lunch or whatever, get her kid all worked up saying "I'm going to miss you," and then would leave finally. It drove me crazy!

[NightOwl]

It's the act that gets us all bent!
Why act like you miss your child desperately, then leave them with us all day out of convenience?
Yay.....us daycare providers, we have no idea what some parents are up to, and all fell off the turnip truck yesterday! ....::.............

Had a mom once that left her baby with me while she vacationed for a week with her family at the beach. Of course she conveniently told me on Friday, the last day of her vacation. Not that I could've told her she couldn't do that, but she obviously knew enough herself that people wouldn't agree with her decision to tell me on Friday.

I'm glad that I chose to be a different type of parent to my children.

And there it is. It's the act. It's the going on and on and missing my sweet pookie and then going to get their hair done or picking up in the same pajamas they dropped off in. I could care less what they do with their time. But don't lie straight to my face about how you miss spending time with your child and how hard it is for you when you're not doing anything at all to change it.

[NightOwl]

I think the problem is that although some families are different in this type of parenting, the truth is that the vast majority BY FAR are the same. I would guess that the percentage of parents who would choose time with their child over using daycare when the price is the same is about five... maybe ten percent.

I think most parents who don't use max hours have a time or money deal that makes it so that it's more convenient or less expensive in gas or wear and tear on the car for them to pick up before they have to.

All things being equal the percentage of parents who choose time with their kid when they could have the child in care is a very small percentage imho

Agreed

[Cat Herder]

I see this more than not, now. Sometimes it is in the kids best interest. Nuff said... but I will continue on as always... ::::

If you don't want your mellow harshed, move along, now. ::::

What is bothering me lately are the ones who do this then say things like "I wish I could afford to stay home, you are so lucky", "have fun playing with the kids! I'm jealous.", "it must be nice to have time to clean your house and cook at work, I have to put in another days work AFTER I get home" or "that sounds so fun!! I wish I could hang out with you guys all day". Really?

1. I planned, saved and sacrificed to be able to do this. Before conception. It was not luck.

2. I don't play with kids. I set up opportunities for the kids to learn life skills from play. If you envy my job, give it a go. You will most likely save money by not having to pay me to do it and following a better planned budget. Try it.

3. I am never really off work. Never. (well, until my kids are out and self supporting) I care for your kids during the day and mine the rest of the time. I'd bet your house does not have 11 kids through it daily. I prepared 4,320 meals so far this year. (and keep the tax books to know that number off hand.)

4. It is condescending unless you are trying to get your kid excited by pretending to talk to me about our day. "Fun" stuff with a group of infants and toddlers is Hard Work. Give it a try. I double dog dare you.

Steps down from soap box. :hug:

[bananas]

One mom is like this - she'll take the day to herself to catch up on laundry, get her hair done...my friend often comments how she sees so-and-so's mom grocery shopping at the store in the middle of the day. She also works really wonky hours too. I have DCB from 8am-5:30pm though... but I have daily rates! So if the child comes, I get paid for that day....so it really doesn't matter to me what the parents are doing!

[Shell]

I see this more than not, now. Sometimes it is in the kids best interest. Nuff said... but I will continue on as always... ::::

If you don't want your mellow harshed, move along, now. ::::

What is bothering me lately are the ones who do this then say things like "I wish I could afford to stay home, you are so lucky", "have fun playing with the kids! I'm jealous.", "it must be nice to have time to clean your house and cook at work, I have to put in another days work AFTER I get home" or "that sounds so fun!! I wish I could hang out with you guys all day". Really?

1. I planned, saved and sacrificed to be able to do this. Before conception. It was not luck.

2. I don't play with kids. I set up opportunities for the kids to learn life skills from play. If you envy my job, give it a go. You will most likely save money by not having to pay me to do it and following a better planned budget. Try it.

3. I am never really off work. Never. (well, until my kids are out and self supporting) I care for your kids during the day and mine the rest of the time. I'd bet your house does not have 11 kids through it daily. I prepared 4,320 meals so far this year. (and keep the tax books to know that number off hand.)

4. It is condescending unless you are trying to get your kid excited by pretending to talk to me about our day. "Fun" stuff with a group of infants and toddlers is Hard Work. Give it a try. I double dog dare you.

Steps down from soap box. :hug:

Yes!