Are all new dc parents like this?

[Shell]

I just had two new families start. Both parents of infants, both not working full time, both crying dcm's first day saying they can't stand being apart, lots if drop off drama. Guess what?! By day two, both kids here open to close, both in workout clothes, both have manicures and pedicures. What happened to that dcm that just couldn't part from their sweet little cherub?!::

[cheerfuldom]

I know. that is why so many of us do contracted hours. It is rare that a parent wont leave a child here open to close. However, I have three families right now that all pickup their kids right after work! this has never happened before. Most families will just push and push for more time. To me, 10 hours is too long for children and this is why I work for teachers......shorter days for me and them.

[cara041083]

Oh ya I know what you mean. I have 2 parents that get random days off and still bring them but always stand in my door way saying "Oh I feel so bad leaving her/him." um then why are you . I just always look and smile.

[Crazy8]

It usually takes mine about 2 weeks to get to that point, not 2 days, LOL! But I haven't started a new family in almost 2 years so I am sure its getting worse.

[KIDZRMYBIZ]

Yep, this is the world we live in now. I started a new baby yesterday. It was his very first day of daycare...and he was the first one in and the last one out. Dcd commented on it at pick-up, too. I think it bothered him.

It's just the way it is now. I had to make my peace with it a few years ago. It was just eating me up, making me so mad and sad, as I don't understand it at all. My dh said something that made me let it go. He said, "It's a good thing, Honey. Since they spend so much time with you there are just a lot of little OurLastNames out there, making the world a better place." lovethis

[Heidi]

One way I've curbed some of this is to limit each child's day to 9.5 hours, unless there are extenuating circumstances. I also do contracted hours. One of the first things I ask in a phone interview is what hours they need care, and then I dig.

I had one mom say she needed 6am-4pm. I said "oh, I don't star that early". Then, she said "well, dad doesn't work until 8, I guess he could get them ready and bring them at 7:45 or so". They live less than a mile from me, btw. So, it's not exactly out of the way.

Yeah...how about we let dad be a parent? Great idea!

[NightOwl]

This still frustrates me to no end. I talked about it in a thread a few weeks ago and most commented that "it's none of my business" if dcps are off work. Maybe not, but it still bugs me that they're leaving their children at least once or twice per week while they're off all day, but still whine about how hard it is to leave them. Then they pick up with fresh manicures and a new do. Yeah, not TOO hard apparently. I'm grateful for the full house, don't get me wrong. But as a mom, I would never leave my child in childcare for 10+ hours per day twice a week for "me" time.

[daycare]

I cant even begin to tell you how many parents say during the interview oh well I get off at 2, so I will be right over at 245 when nap time ends....


they do it the first day and then once they realize they have a good deal they never do it again....kid gets picked up at 530.

[Blackcat31]

Families do what works for them.

We don't know that just because we limit the hours they are here that the parent is actually going home and spending quality time with their child. They may simply pass them off to another caregiver or turn on the TV.

I decided a long time ago that I would do what was best for ME and MY family and not expect, require or judge another family by MY beliefs or thoughts about parenting.

Many providers complain about this and in total honesty, I don't feel we have that right.

Just because we wouldn't do something doesn't mean it's not okay for others. Especially since we don't know their home life or situations.

We are providers for MANY different reasons and on the same note, parents parent the way they do for just as many different reasons.

It is much easier on you (general you) as a provider, a parent and a person to just do what YOU need to do as far as rules/policies and not let other people's parenting decisions/styles bother you.

[daycare]

Families do what works for them.

We don't know that just because we limit the hours they are here that the parent is actually going home and spending quality time with their child. They may simply pass them off to another caregiver or turn on the TV.

I decided a long time ago that I would do what was best for ME and MY family and not expect, require or judge another family by MY beliefs or thoughts about parenting.

Many providers complain about this and in total honesty, I don't feel we have that right.

Just because we wouldn't do something doesn't mean it's not okay for others. Especially since we don't know their home life or situations.

We are providers for MANY different reasons and on the same note, parents parent the way they do for just as many different reasons.

It is much easier on you (general you) as a provider, a parent and a person to just do what YOU need to do as far as rules/policies and not let other people's parenting decisions/styles bother you.

LIke you, I could care less what my parents are doing while their kids are here. I have plenty of families that have their kids here all day with me and they don't even work.

As long as they follow my rules and pay on time, I don't care what you do.

BUT as I stated in my other post, All of my parents PLAN an early pick up and then never follow through with it...

[Blackcat31]

LIke you, I could care less what my parents are doing while their kids are here. I have plenty of families that have their kids here all day with me and they don't even work.

As long as they follow my rules and pay on time, I don't care what you do.

BUT as I stated in my other post, All of my parents PLAN an early pick up and then never follow through with it...

That part, I WOULD have an issue with but because it affects ME.

I change what things bother me and the rest, I try to leave alone because I can't do anything about it so why take on the extra stress...kwim?

[daycare]

That part, I WOULD have an issue with but because it affects ME.

I change what things bother me and the rest, I try to leave alone because I can't do anything about it so why take on the extra stress...kwim?

it does not bother me one bit, but it does happen. If I get more time with the kid great, as long as I am paid I don't care. Put more money in my pocket please.

I think it was Nan that said to me that you will hardly ever find a parent that does not say one thing about pick up time and then do another especially when they say I am going to pick up early.

[cheerfuldom]

One way I've curbed some of this is to limit each child's day to 9.5 hours, unless there are extenuating circumstances. I also do contracted hours. One of the first things I ask in a phone interview is what hours they need care, and then I dig.

I had one mom say she needed 6am-4pm. I said "oh, I don't star that early". Then, she said "well, dad doesn't work until 8, I guess he could get them ready and bring them at 7:45 or so". They live less than a mile from me, btw. So, it's not exactly out of the way.

Yeah...how about we let dad be a parent? Great idea!

oh yeah. definitely contracted hours are the way to go. I ask where the parents work and what their shift is and make sure I know what times they really NEED. I was so livid the first time several years ago that I found out a mom had been using max hours and dad didnt even go into work till 9am but did not want to deal with the baby in the morning.....my word, she was a delightful kid, it really wouldnt have been hard at all.

[racemom]

I really try not to care if the parents are home and kids at daycare, but I hate when they stand there saying how much they miss them. I have one dcm, child open to close every day, who travels frequently. Every time she is going out of town she goes on and on about how much she will miss dcb, then when she gets back she gets time off work to make up for travel, weekend, etc. time she was away. He never stays home with her, her excuse---I have so much to do at home to make up for being gone! I have permanent teeth marks in my tongue from biting it so hard and often! Sorry for the rant.

[GabsKids]

When I first started, this would bother me also, but quickly learned that if I worried about what all if these parents were doing all day, I would drive myself insane. So I realized, it really doesn't matter. As long as they are dropped off/picked up at their contracted times I didn't care. If they need a little extra time for a meeting or an appointment they ask ahead of time and I am fine with it. Now if it became a habit, I would say something.

When I worked outside of the home I couldn't wait to have a day off to spend with my son. When my daughter was born my husband worked days and I worked evenings to limit childcare. But to each their own. BC is absolutely right. Every parent is different and every families situation is different.