Still crying at dropoff at age 4, after coming here for over 3 years

[Childminder]

I had a boy that was like that, you never knew what his next moment would be like, happy or sobbing. The center of the group or on the outskirts looking in and almost always crying at drop off. Part of his problem was mom would not get him on a sleep schedule and was up till all hours.

Turned out he was diagnosed when he got to kindergarten as bi-polar. Ran in the family, an uncle and grandfather.

[nothingwithoutjoy]

My first thought was that she must be part-time. For kids who would have a hard time with separating anyway, part-time schedules are extra difficult. I find certain kids can take years for them to settle into a routine when they only come a few days a week. I'd be upfront with the parents about what's happening and suggest full-time either with you or grandma. It might just be enough to have the consistency. And if it turns out it has something to do with how she's treated at home, then you will be the one who has her most, so you will be able to make a big change in her expectations of how the day should go.

Hoping it improves soon for you--the crying is exhausting!

[Indoorvoice]

Have you tried talking to the child about it? I had a similar situation with 3yo boy. After a particularly terrible drop off one morning, I simply sat him down and said nicely, but firmly, "you will NOT be acting like that anymore." We had a good conversation about it. He's been great ever since. Also recently did that with another dcg2.5 after getting some advice from this board!

[SunshineMama]

I have talked to the child several times. As frustrating as it is, the mom is more frustrating to deal with. She emailed me back again, saying it's hard for her to know what "goes on" at my house, and that dcg tells her she has fun most days. She is implying that there must be an issue with my daycare, since her child still cries when she comes over. It's borderline insulting. It not my job to make sure that princess has fun every second of every day she comes here.

[daycare]

I have talked to the child several times. As frustrating as it is, the mom is more frustrating to deal with. She emailed me back again, saying it's hard for her to know what "goes on" at my house, and that dcg tells her she has fun most days. She is implying that there must be an issue with my daycare, since her child still cries when she comes over. It's borderline insulting. It not my job to make sure that princess has fun every second of every day she comes here.

as I was saying in my post, I had the same exact issue and got sick of having to report the same thing every day...crying, crying and then tantrums all day long.

some kids can do PT, some kids can't.

when their environments are so different they just can't seem to get it. I tried for almost 2 years and then threw in the towel. If the parent is not going to get on board and try to help you fix it, then you need to let them go some where they will be able to proivde "special" all the time to this child.

Not every child is right for your/my environment. It's not our fault

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I have talked to the child several times. As frustrating as it is, the mom is more frustrating to deal with. She emailed me back again, saying it's hard for her to know what "goes on" at my house, and that dcg tells her she has fun most days. She is implying that there must be an issue with my daycare, since her child still cries when she comes over. It's borderline insulting. It not my job to make sure that princess has fun every second of every day she comes here.

That makes me angry for you.

I would type up your schedule, detail the things the child enjoys doing there, detail the way you handle discipline, and then I would put it on her ... what do y'all do at YOUR house? What does your child enjoying doing there? How do YOU handle discipline?