Oh The Funny Things We Hear Ourselves Say...

[KiddieCahoots]

OMG I'm dying over here ::::::

My son 3 last night "Mommy look at my big weeny! Here it is, see it?" I tell him to leave it alone and please don't put it in my face , I can see from where you are. A couple minutes later I hear "Mommy, it's a tiny baby weeny again!" O...M...G...!

::::::.....Too Funny!
Add my son 5yr to those ranks.
Once they discover it, it's the love affair that never ends! ::....

[Wubby]

When I read it, I figured the boys didn't take off the dress up clothes before lunch

Yep, everyday I have to tell them princess dresses need to come off before lunch.

[Papa]

I thought I heard it all

As I told a young one that I want the worm so I can let it go to be with its family, I took two steps away and he belted out YOU Piece of S-it! Can't say what I was thinking but mom said ya he says that alot

[daycare]

hey get your hands out of her pants...................

[Josiegirl]

"Whose foot is this on the shelf?"
We made plaster of paris feet the other day.......

"Can someone do the sniff test on A#####?"
Needs no explanation I'm sure.

[Happily_wed]

To 4 yr old daycare girl on her first day here with new baby brother "stop smelling your brother's butt!' She spent the entire day sniffing his butt, telling me how good his diapers smelled, etc

and to a 7 yr old yesterday "stop licking yourself!" What is it with kids licking themselves if they get a boo boo? does someone teach them to do that or is it just some sort of instinct?

[SilverSabre25]

"No, the dog is not a cylinder" <--to my 6.5 year old today during a discussion of/lesson on 3-D shapes. We concluded that she is more of a box (rectangular prism) if we MUSt call her something other than "dog shaped"

[tehck_1013]

Today I said, "Pull your sisters wedgie!" Then I laughed and was like I can't believe I just said that. Stupid swimsuits I swear I had to adjust dcg2 100 times today.

Haha. I did help her again btw cuz I laughed imagining her 4yr old brother trying to pull her wedgie out omg.

[BabyMonkeys]

to dcd - "his poop was firm today, so I flushed it. I didn't think you would want it. I'm sure he will give you lots of poop this weekend"

6m dcb had been exclusively breastfed, so his poop was always soft. This was the 1st poop since we started him on solids. They cloth diaper, so they see everything in his diapers.

my 16 year old daughter was dying laughing.

[Unregistered]

you ladies are awesome. It's the first time I laughed all day
and I was in tears LOLing!

[MOM OF 4]

"Cars don't care to look fo you guys, so stay with me!"
"Don't eat that!"
"OMG do NOT jump on your brother, you'll kill him" (As I was catching MY dd trying to jump from the bunk bed onto her brother who was on all 4's like a horsie during a nap. Thankfully, I caught her MID AIR, and all because I thought it was too quiet too quickly! )
"No! Stop putting the cat's water in your sippy, NOW"
"We don't eat the dog food!" (repeated for cat food too!)
"No, those are cones, not basements" (my son insisted construction cones were "scary basements"
"DD! Check DS'S POOP please"
"You need meat on your bones, kid"
"DS, (2yo) your poop smells like lavender. why does it smell like lavender?" (Then I smelled his mouth, he'd eaten a glade plug in, little weasel)
Same 2yo DS after nappin in his room: "OMG we do NOT unscrew your lamp, give me that screwdriver!" (the kid was pretty good though and actually asked if he could put back together so I supervised and he COULD!)

[Sunchimes]

This is just another in the long chain of "don't lick" things. At the splash pad the other day, I had to tell a toddler not to lick the tree. There were 2 dads there with their kids, and you could see them shaking their heads, trying not to laugh. (He's autistic and looks way too old to be licking trees.)

[Michelle]

Do not eat the cat food
cat food is for kitties
so then they dropped to all fours and meowed and kept eating it

[AmyKidsCo]

I did a blog post once on the Top 10 Weird Things Heard in our House:

1. “Could you please not sneeze into the batter?”
– Daughter in Law to my five year old while making cheesecakes.

2. “This isn’t my band-aid – why is it on my knee?”
– My 11 yr old, staring at his left knee.

3. “Where are your clothes?”
– Said often to my two yr old granddaughters.

4. “Well, I was trying to hit a bug with this cantaloupe…”
- The 11 yr old again, on how he hit his head.

5. “Don’t take your pants off and dance on the table!”
– Daughter in Law to two-year-old nekkie stage granddaughter.

6. “Stop licking the cat!”
– Me to the 3 yr old. Poor Kitty!

7. “What are you eating and where did you get it?”
– Any adult to any of the younger four children.

8. “Oh! It’s not my bra; it’s me!”
– 19 yr old daughter, after discovering what was bugging her all day.

9. “It smells like a llama in here.
– 16 yr old daughter, for no apparent reason.

10. “Why are you naked?!”
– Me to my 3 yr old, way too often.
Oh yes, they call him the Streak; fastest thing on two feet…

[tehck_1013]

Are you drinking the ground? STOP. DRINKING. THE GROUND!


(just turned sprinkler off and MY son started slurping the puddle like a dog. omg)