When a DCM Has a New Baby...

[Mom of 4]

the only problem that posses to parents is the fact they are the first ones to complain how they can't get anything done with 2 kids or can't go anywhere with 2 kids. Well, dummies thats because you never trained yourself to deal with 2 kids, its easier to dump one off and only deal with one kid at a time.

This is a friend of mine. I used to take 8 kids out everywhere, and once in awhile, I had a 9th. This girl did nothing but complain about how her ONE child was costing her too much for childcare and she couldn't get anything done. I just stared at her while she was complaining. She said "What?" I said "Oh, nothing, I've taken 9...to the store, out to eat, to the park, to the zoo, etc...so I dont' really feel sorry for you. And K who works with you making the same money is paying my FULL rate at $100/week x 2 kids, so you must not be budgeting for this" She shut up really quick. I just got tired of her whining so I let her have it.

To this day, she hasn't changed, and in fact, gave up her child to her ex rather than takes the child at all and STILL cannot pay ANY of her bills. It's just her and the boyfriend moocher living with some lady who doesn't charge them rent, so IDK HOW she is unable to afford ANYTHING on her salary which is NOT bad.

[cheerfuldom]

I can't believe mat leave is so short in the US. Craziness!!

I don't know the statistics but MANY mothers get no paid maternity leave at all and can't afford to take more than a few days. After my third daughter was born, I was back to work within the week. I, like many American mothers, do not have the option to not work.

Let's not be too hard on each other. We never know the whole story of why someone is doing what they are doing. If a mother is paying for the spot for an older child, I don't feel it is my place for faulting her for using it. Consistency while transitioning in a new child is very important and there are many parenting experts/outlets/doctors that encourage mothers to keep their older children on the exact same schedule. When a new sibling is coming, that is not the time to shake up big siblings' schedules, if it can be avoided. Recovering from child birth and caring for a newborn is work so I still fulfill my own personal rule to only care for the children of working parents

[wdmmom]

I have four children and all of my kids were with me when they weren't in preschool/school.

I was floored at how common it now is to have the oldest continue regular daycare while mom is home recovering.

One of my dcm's was off for 3.5 months. Dcb came in full time, every single day for the same 9 hours a day he did when mom was working. (Drove me nuts!)

Other dcm kept older boy home with her the first 3 days recovering since family was in town. They then cut him down to part time 5 hours a day 4 days a week which was about half the time he normally came. (That schedule worked great!)

[My3cents]

I think every family does what is best for them.

Either way, some providers complain because parents don't keep their kids home and some complain because they can't find parents interested in full time care.

To each his/her own. I wouldn't judge a family for whatever choice they make as ultimately only they know what is best for their family unit.

I feel this way too!

I often think to myself your child is going to grow up so fast and if you could spend that time with your child you should. I encourage it, because not only is it good for the child/family/parents its good for the provider to get that break from a child that comes full time everyday~ Ultimately I too feel it is the parents choice to make- The parents know what their needs are.

Someone that abuses your program is a whole other ball game and as a provider it is up to me to speak up and not allow that.

[MrsSteinel'sHouse]

my dd went to Kindergarten the day after ds was born and was brought to the hospital in the afternoon to visit. My sister (who was in college) had her and so she went to school as usual. I was 40 min away in the hospital for 5 days. My sister would get dd up in the morning and take her to kindergarten and pick her up at noon. Dh would go to work. Stop and see us at the hospital. Go home and have dinner with dd. But basically, after I had ds, dd and dh continued on their normal routine until I got home.

If dd had been in daycare at that point I am sure they would have dropped her off there.

[Jack Sprat]

I have a dcm who is being induced on Thursday. Last time we talked dcg would be here while she was on maternity leave. Dcm has been home the last 3 weeks and dcg has come to daycare at least 3 days of the week. This is fine with me. They are paying for her spot regardless if she is here or not. I am rather happy she will still come while dcm is home, that way we don't break routine.

[lilcupcakes09]

This totally made my night after a rough day!!!! I have families that would fall under this category!! It makes my heart ache to see the kids in this situation, but all I can do is have a big heart and keep everything normal for them here. I'm due in November and there is no way in this world my other child will be put on the back burner....he will be with Daddy, Baby, and I at all times(besides times that may be a little unsuitable), but the nurses know how to deal with these "times".

Sadly, this is completely normal.

What shocks me the most is when they continue to bring them regularly for an entire year while they stay home and enjoy their new baby.

It boggles my mind that these DCPs don't realize the affect this has on their child and the possible aggression the child may have towards their sibling later on.

Note to all Daycare Parents - Kids would NOT rather be at daycare and if they would rather be at daycare then YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING WRONG!

YOU would rather they be at daycare.......and for that reason, you probably shouldn't be reproducing anymore!