wwyd?

[Maggie]

Not sure if anyone remembers but I posted a few months ago for advice when a dcd was asked not to come visit his boys while I was at an appt. and my 20 year old daughter was here alone with the kids and came by anyway peering through my back door. I ended up terming that family the next day. Well two weeks later the mom comes by 15 minutes before closing time, knocks then opens the door and comes in. Another dcg had a play date at her house the weekend before and left her jacket she was returning it. Other dcg lives 2 minutes away. Two weeks later mom calls me, her boys miss me and would like to come visit. I tell her no it's too confusing for them. A few weeks later I get a Christmas card from them with a family pic again saying boys miss me can they come visit. I didn't respond. Yesterday mom calls again and leaves a message saying I had such an impact on her boys and they are still asking to see me can they come visit. I hate to be mean but I really don't want to see her or her kids. Had things ended differently and she hadn't called licensing to try to get me in trouble, maybe, but I don't want them here. Should I just keep ignoring her or let her know I don't want to see them please quit asking.

[JenNJ]

I would send a letter (certified) stating that she needs to stop all contact with you or you will file a restraining order. She sounds unstable.

[ihop]

Personally, I would respond ONCE and say something like "it was a pleasure caring for your children and I am glad they enjoyed their time at ABC Daycare. Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate visits from former daycare families. Thank you for your understanding on the matter. Regards, You slightly stalked provider"

If she continues to reach out, I'd ignore her. If she keeps coming by you may need a cease and desist letter. Good luck :hug:

[daycarediva]

I would ignore, or return items to sender at this point.

If you felt like she would persist, I would send her a letter back, maybe with a photo of the boys while they were in your care and say that while you enjoyed having them and miss them, you think it's best that they not visit to help them move on.

[NeedaVaca]

She just walked right in? OMG, that would make me so mad...she definitely sounds a little unstable. I like Ihop's idea, one time communication, let her know visits are not a good idea. Besides, you are working? I don't "visit" with any of my DCK's past or present. Be firm enough that hopefully this doesn't continue.

[Shell]

Personally, I would respond ONCE and say something like "it was a pleasure caring for your children and I am glad they enjoyed their time at ABC Daycare. Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate visits from former daycare families. Thank you for your understanding on the matter. Regards, You slightly stalked provider"

If she continues to reach out, I'd ignore her. If she keeps coming by you may need a cease and desist letter. Good luck :hug:

[coolconfidentme]

One word......, creepy!

[butterfly]

This sounds familiar... the only family I have ever termed would not stop trying to get back into my care. They would call continuously. It came to the point where I was getting freaked out. I did not want to provide care for them (hence the term! ) Finally, after many many conversations with the family - repeatedly telling them "no", my dh got fed up and got on the phone and told them in not so nice terms to quit calling here or we'd have to take further action.

[Maggie]

Yes she is creepy and her husband is even creepier! I think I will ignore the latest message but answer the next time she calls and let her know, not gonna happen time to move on. Thanks for your replies.

[taylorw1210]

What was the purpose of DCD peering through your windows? Jeez. This family sounds like they have a few screws loose.

[KidGrind]

Do not ever open the door for that pair.

[cheerfuldom]

I would write a firm letter. Short and firm. No thanks or response or apologies just straight to the point.

Dear X,

I cannot accommodate your daycare needs now or in the future. Please refrain from coming by my house or contacting me in any way from now on.

From Y

[Maggie]

A short but firm letter is a better idea then waiting for her next phone call. I could totally see her just stopping by because I never responded to her message. They were with me for 3 years so both parents know my door gets unlocked 30 minutes before I expect my first pickup. I'm not worried about either of them hurting me or anyone else I would just feel very uncomfortable if they came here. They have some major boundary issues.

[Blackcat31]

A short but firm letter is a better idea then waiting for her next phone call. I could totally see her just stopping by because I never responded to her message. They were with me for 3 years so both parents know my door gets unlocked 30 minutes before I expect my first pickup. I'm not worried about either of them hurting me or anyone else I would just feel very uncomfortable if they came here. They have some major boundary issues.

Is the family aware that you know they reported you to licensing?

If so, I might not be able to help myself and would consider saying something about it.

Something like "While I enjoyed my time with your children, I am afraid that due to you making a false report to licensing regarding my program, I don't feel it would be in anyone's best interest to visit or have continued contact. It would be best if there is no further contact between us. Thank you"

That way she knows that you do NOT want to be "friends"

[Maggie]

I've never confronted her about reporting me I guess I didn't want her to have the satisfaction of knowing it bothered me and I'm not sure if my licensor was supposed to be as open with me as she was about what was told to her and I didn't want her in any trouble. On the plus side I was also due for my inspection at that time so she got that out of the way while she was here too!