Why Do They Do This To Me!!!

[Leigh]

I would tell him Mom said that she is taking him to the park when she picks him up!
And then remind him that Mom is going to take him when Mom is there too.

::::::

[Lucy]

I wouldn't give any weight to it. If you start telling the kid, "mom got it wrong", "mom didn't look at the schedule", "mom doesn't decide what we do", etc., etc., etc, it puts the kid in a position of power over both of you. He can go back and forth and stir things up. He'll make a game out of it.

This is how it would go for me:

"Mom promised you'd take me to the park today"
"We're going to the library today "

End of it. I'd do the same thing each time. Soon enough he'll learn that mom's stupid "promises" mean nothing.

[Kcole1075]

I wouldn't give any weight to it. If you start telling the kid, "mom got it wrong", "mom didn't look at the schedule", "mom doesn't decide what we do", etc., etc., etc, it puts the kid in a position of power over both of you. He can go back and forth and stir things up. He'll make a game out of it.

This is how it would go for me:

"Mom promised you'd take me to the park today"
"We're going to the library today "

End of it. I'd do the same thing each time. Soon enough he'll learn that mom's stupid "promises" mean nothing.

That is what said!

I believe mom is making these promises because a few times she promised his friend would be here and broke down in tears when friend wasnt here and it was just him and his brother. He looked at her and said "you promised he would be here" and she admitted to it. That was the first time i had to talk to her. She admits to telling him these things.

We went to the library and he wasnt happy about it but oh well they arent controlling my daycare

[Kcole1075]

Tell little Johnny that momma is taking him McDonald's or Chuck E Cheeze's when she picks him up. hahaha

We are about 45 minutes from disneyland so i should say that his mom told me that she was going to take the whole family there!! They re a family of six so that is gonna cost $$$ for them to keep my promise.

[Meeko]

I told my dcb that this was MY daycare and his mom could not tell me what to do. I am sure he told her that, too. ::

happyfacehappyfacehappyfacehappyfacehappyfacehappyfacehappyface

[Meeko]

I would tell him Mom said that she is taking him to the park when she picks him up!
And then remind him that Mom is going to take him when Mom is there too.

::happyface

[Meeko]

We are about 45 minutes from disneyland so i should say that his mom told me that she was going to take the whole family there!! They re a family of six so that is gonna cost $$$ for them to keep my promise.

::::::

[nannyde]

I have a kid that tells me in front of Mom what we are going to do. Puts me in a hard place to say No to something. I like free play with the toys that are out, not taking out something I might take out later to play. I feel like this kid sets me up in front of the mom to do whatever this kid wants to do. Sometimes I am good at saying something and other times not.

Any ideas on this-

Answer "we'll see"

Kid: I want to paint
You "we'll see"

Kid I want to go to park
You "we'll see"

Kid: I want candy for breakfast
You "we'll see"

[nannyde]

I have one family where dcm or dcd keep making promises to their kids but the promises aren't something they atre going to do ITS SOMETHING I AM GOING TO DO!!!
These parents have my schedule so they should see it is library day. But their 5 year old has told me all morning they promised him i would take them to the park. They have done this before promising specific snacks or lunches, that certain kids would be here (his friend is a part timer and only comes m-w but they "promised" ) or activties. I asked mom about it the first time it happened and she admitted " yea i told him that you would be going to the park" . I asked her to make sure she looks at the schedule before telling him what we doing. I keep having this conversation with her .

And i have to be the bad guy and tell them no thats not what we are doing/ eating today. It is really annoying!!! By way they are not new kids and i have my schedule for about 2 months.

I would just say "Oh your Mommy is SO silly. Did you laugh when she said that? I think she's trying to make you laugh. Silly Mommy. ::"

[Msdunny]

I think there are parents who will say yes to a request like that thinking the child will forget or 'not remember correctly' when the time comes.

I don't remember this ever happening here, but I would just say, "sorry, that's not on the schedule today, but maybe another day." I don't get overly concerned with meeting parents' expectations in these kinds of situations - if they love my care like they say they do, they will trust me and will be ok with my schedule. As for the kids, a little disappointment every once in a while is ok.

[Happily_wed]

I have not only had them tell me "mommy said we would do x, y or z" I have had them show up with craft kids, gingerbread house kits,etc. and tell me that mommy said I would help them do them. I put them back into their bag and tell them I already have things planned and they can take it back home for MOMMY to do with them over the weekend .

In your case I would just say "oh mommy must have read the schedule wrong. Today we are going to the library. We might go to the park another day though."

[Naptime yet?]

Answer "we'll see"

Kid: I want to paint
You "we'll see"

Kid I want to go to park
You "we'll see"

Kid: I want candy for breakfast
You "we'll see"

And as my dds know, this means NO in mommy-talk