Turning down a 'trial day?"

[newtodaycare22]

I had a family come and look at my place yesterday. Usually I take 3-5 year olds but they had a 3 year old and 19 month old. I said maybe we could work something out. Then, there are all these extras like a changing schedule, 3 days a week that change, and sometimes it'd be both girls and sometimes just one. Now, they emailed me and said they want to bring the kids by this week so they can meet the other kids. They still arent sure if they want a daycare or care in their home.

I really don't want to be bothered with that. I think it will confuse my current kids if they show up and don't come back, and I feel like they are only bringing the kids so they can watch me. Had the feeling mom doesn't trust too well. Can anyone suggest a good wording to turn down this little "observation day"? Thanks!

[MarinaVanessa]

That's a little difficult sinve the norm for a family daycare home is to have the kiddos try the daycare out for a day and see if they like the daycare and let's not forget how it's a good way for us as providers to see how the new child or children will interact and get along with the group.

I know as a parent that if the provider that I was interested in told me no matter how nicely that my kids could not have a trial day I'd be a little put off. I would wonder if this was a warning sign especially if I was expecting to stay at least for a little bit to see how the provider handled the children. I would wonder "what if my kids don't like it there? Why would she say no?" etc.

I'm one of those provider that always has a trial day more for my own benefit rather than for the new client. I want to see how the child behaves, if the parent is present I want to see the family dynamic and how the parent interacts with their child, who runs the roost so to speak, does the child listen? Does the child become aggresive etc. A parent may want to see if their child likes my daycare but I want to see if I like the child for my daycare.

[Live and Learn]

You could ask if they have any questions that they still need answering and let them know that you have a two week trial period built in to your contract. You could say that your insurance won't allow children to be left in your care without a signed contract. This is probably a hard decision for them and they just need a gentle nudge. You could offer to email updates to them FOR THE FIRST COUPLE OF DAYS.

[Live and Learn]

I have never offered a trial day and have never sent any lil one packing after the two week trial period.

[Lucy]

Bottom line is you should do what you're comfortable with. (Or in this case, NOT do what you're NOT comfortable with.) My thoughts are that this would be fine with me. I've had people do that too. They just want to see if the kids gel. I've had interviews when none of my DC kids were around, and then they want to bring their kids during the day to meet all the DC kids. I see no problem with that. I'm sure she just wants to stay briefly. Maybe you could tell her it's ok, but you can only spare 15 minutes?? Besides, you'll probably be chatting with her during the time she's there, so she won't be sitting off in a corner "watching" you work with the kids.

ETA: Oh, maybe I misunderstood what you said this mom wants. Does she want to come with the kids and stay for a bit so the kids can meet, or does she want to leave her kids with you for a day or part of a day as a trial run? I took it to be that she just wanted to have the kids meet and she would stay for just a bit then leave with the kids. Oh well...

[ninosqueridos]

I wouldn't do it simply because my dck's and my own kids would act much differently with strangers in the room anyway so it wouldn't be a true "observation to see if I trust you" day. I would stick with offering the trial period in the beginning (2 weeks or whatever) and that's it. Sometimes I'll have a dcp "hang around" a little too long and the dck's end up swarming the visiting dcp, bringing them books, toys, etc and they end up leaving pretty fast. ::

[marniewon]

I'm not comfortable with a parent "hanging out" for a while with their kids, but I do usually conduct some of the interviews while my dck's are here. You could tell her, sure, I have about 15 minutes that I can spare at xx o'clock on Monday (or whatever day). Let them know that your dc is very busy and you would not want to take any more time than that away from your duties as a caregiver.

[sierrastreasures]

I made the mistake of interviewing in the middle of the day since neither of the parents could make it at night. What a nightmare.

Normally my dcks take out one toy and put the one that they were playing with back. These parents watched as her two children cleared almost every one of my shelves with toys as my other dcks looked at me in horror.

Never ever do an interview during daycare. After a night interview I encourage dcp to come back with dck and just observe his/her playing with other children. I never offer a free day or trial day. After and hour I can tell if new dck with fit into our happy little group. Any time a child is in my care even if it's an hour, there's a charge for my services.

[kidkair]

I have developed a habit of doing two interviews with families. The first is just parents in the evening (sometimes during hours sometimes after but always after nap time) The second is with the kid either in the morning or afternoon to see how the kids react to each other. I warn my kids before hand that we are having a guest and afterward talk to them about what they liked or didn't like about the guest. Then I make my decision as to whether or not to give the parents any paper work to fill out. I will never watch kids without parents around if I do not have all the required paperwork.