The Roll of Your Own Children in Your Daycare

[DancingQueen]

I have 4 of my own children.
16 (b)
14 (g)
8 (b)
4 (g)

My older two do not count towards my daycare count.
My 8 year old is a SA
and my 4 year old counts as a full day child.

In my never ending quest to find balance between work and home.. I'm wondering what roll do your own children have in your daycare?

Are they treated as any other child? Are there any special priveleges at all? Or do you allow them to do what they would normally do if your business wasn't there?
Also - what about "their" toys and things. How do you (if you do at all) keep their things separate and allow them to have a sense of their own space when daycare tends to take over our homes.

[kendallina]

I have a 2-yr old daughter. I try to keep her toys separate from the preschool toys, which is mostly easy because i have a separate room for preschool. So, things like gifts or toys that are really special to her stay in her room. If she chooses to bring them out for preschool, that's fine, but if another child wants to use it when she's done, she needs to share.

The only special 'privilege' she gets is that she is able to eat a snack outside of snack times. My reasoning for this is because she has always been extremely small in weight and has some medical issues and tends to eat smaller amounts more frequently. The other children (all 2-3 years old) know that she's allowed to eat whenever and rarely even ask for any.

[BentleysBands]

i have 4

18(b)
15(g)
11(g)
6(b)

where i am and the ages, my kids do not count in my #'s
my 2 youngest play w/the kids and sometimes help when needed (like outside time esp.)
'their' toys stay in their rooms, if they dont want the dck's to play with them. whats in the daycare is fair game. as for a schedule of things, they do as they would if daycare were closed. if they eat something, it must be done so the dck's do not see for the most part.

[marniewon]

I have 2 boys living at home still, ages 13 and 15. They are homeschooled, so they are here with me all day long. They are my helpers. I pay them a minimal amount per day for them to help: watching the kids, with walks/outside time, preparing meals, etc.

[SunflowerMama]

Mine are younger...3 1/2 yr old twins.

I treat everyone the same as far as house rules (running, playing on furniture, speaking nicely to each other, eating and drinking at the table, etc.). The house rules remain the same whether daycare kids are here or not. They also participate in all the curriculum activities/crafts and love them!!

I can see maybe when they get older allowing them to do their own thing in their room but right now the way my daycare is setup I don't have access to my 2nd level, per the State. The girls' room is up there so even if they wanted to go up there they can't since they are counted in my ratio.

[AfterSchoolMom]

Mine are a bit older as well (though not teens yet). They have to follow the same rules as my other SA's as far as getting homework done, respecting the house and each other, etc. However, they have their rooms that they can retreat to, and no one is allowed upstairs, so they know that they will have privacy. They're also allowed to go down the street to play with friends after they get their homework done. Obviously I can't let the others do that. I've never had anyone complain too much about it.

I try to limit their extra snacking while the other kids are here. In my case, I only have them for a few hours each day, so that isn't that hard. However, if they're absolutely starving and it's right before pickup, I'll go ahead and let them have something.

If I had younger kids, I'd definitely try hard to keep their rooms and toys separate.

[SilverSabre25]

My DD is 3 and she does get privileges that the DCKs don't. She's also significantly older than most of them. The playroom, kitchen, bathroom, and bedrooms are all on the same level of the house (bi-level). She is allowed to retreat to her bedroom any time she wants and DCKs are not allowed in there. She has toys in there that she does not have to share with the DCKs. If she brings one out to the playroom and then leaves it out there, it's fair game though. She watches more TV than they are allowed, though usually not when they are awake. She's allowed to come downstairs without me to play with the toys down here. She is often allowed in the kitchen when none of the other kids are.

As she gets older or I get older DCKs, I don't see this changing. She lives here, they don't.

[melskids]

my boys are 8 and 14. both are aged out as far as counting in my ratios. all my house rules are the same, for the most part, regardless of whether the DC kids are here or not.

the 14 yr old can have friends over during DC hours, because they basically do as they please, and are self sufficient. my 8 yr old doesnt have that privelege yet, because he needs more supervision, and i dont want to add more kids here to watch then i can handle. he understands that it is a right of passage that comes with age, just like staying up later, or sitting in the front seat of the car. (he is allowed to have friends over on the weekends)

the boys rooms are off limits unless they are invited in. however, if my son invites one in, he invites them all in (the SA anyway, little ones always stay with me)

my boys toys are off limits, unless they bring them out into DC territory. then its fair game...

as far as eating, we all eat the same thing at the same time. just cause its easier for me, as far as prep, cleanup, meal planning, etc. my 14 yr old may ocassionally want something different, or to eat at a different time. he can, and if the DC kids notice and say anything, i tell them he is not part of my program, so he can do it. they seem to understand that. however, i dont allow him to flaunt cookies or treats in front of them, that just wouldnt be fair.

both boys are allowed to go to their rooms and close the door if they need space.

the only thing i limit, is my older son really likes archery, and i wont let him shoot arrows when the dc kids are here. thats the one thing i do make him wait to do when the kids arent around. its just a safety thing for me.

even though this is my childrens home, i try to keep it on a level playing field. i wouldnt want to be a kid being in a daycare somewhere and not being able to do most of what the other kids are doing. it doesnt seem fair to me. but my kids understand, for the most part, and i make up for it with lots of family time and special activities when the DC kids arent here.

[Lilbutterflie]

Mine are younger...3 1/2 yr old twins.

I treat everyone the same as far as house rules (running, playing on furniture, speaking nicely to each other, eating and drinking at the table, etc.). The house rules remain the same whether daycare kids are here or not. They also participate in all the curriculum activities/crafts and love them!!

I can see maybe when they get older allowing them to do their own thing in their room but right now the way my daycare is setup I don't have access to my 2nd level, per the State. The girls' room is up there so even if they wanted to go up there they can't since they are counted in my ratio.

REALLY??? If I understand you correctly, your own girls cannot access their own room during daycare hours? That seems absolutely absurd to me. Nothing towards you, TwinMama, but I'd be up in arms if the state was trying to tell me my own children could not access their rooms during hours. I understand they count toward your numbers, but they are YOUR children who should be allowed to go into their rooms whenever they want to. Where do they take their naps? Where do they go if they need some time to just cool down by themselves or if they want to be alone? These might not be issues yet b/c of how young they are, but in about a year or two, this will definitely be an issue!

[MommyMuffin]

I am having a hard time with this because my daughter is 2 and it is difficult for her to share anyways. I have hope that when my hubby finishes the basement just for daycare she will have a place to put her toys that are just her's. Right now it is free for all because I am so limited on space right now so she has nothing that is just hers.

[DancingQueen]

I should answer my own question

My 14/16 year old can do as they please as long as it does not effect my daycare day or routine.
They usually hang out in our family room in the basement.

My 8 year old is treated as a before/after school kid except I do have him do his chores during daycare time because there is no time AFTER daycare time (because of activities he is involved in). During the summer he did great -but towards the end he was so OVER the daycare thing that I did let him hang with the two older siblings. But I made him make a choice - you are either a daycare kid and will stick with us and follow the rules or you will hang with your older siblings. I can't have you coming in and out of the daycare as you please.

My 4 year old is treated as any other daycare child with absolutely NO extra priveledges.

[Lilbutterflie]

I am having a hard time with this because my daughter is 2 and it is difficult for her to share anyways. I have hope that when my hubby finishes the basement just for daycare she will have a place to put her toys that are just her's. Right now it is free for all because I am so limited on space right now so she has nothing that is just hers.

I definitely don't see anything wrong with choosing just a couple things for now that are her favorites, and only allowing her to play with them. Just explain these are HER favorite toys, so she's the only one allowed to play unless she invites someone to play with her. It's hard for a two year old to have to share everything every single day. We definitely want to teach our own kids to share, but no other child has to do this on a daily basis with their own belongings, ya know? It certainly is not exactly fair to have nothing be their own in their own house.

[MarinaVanessa]

I have a 5yo DD that counts as a SA (she's in Kinder) and a bun in the oven that I'm expecting next month which will be counted as an infant.

The new baby will ... well, be a baby and either nap in the crib/pack'n'play, sit in the swing, or hang out on the activity mat and poop, drool, pee and eat all day . My daughter helps me out, with cleaning and bringing me things. She's like a small assistant. She has a room with her toys in it but we do use it a few times a week as a play room and I store books, toys etc. in the closet since she has a large closet she's not using.

[DanceMom]

I have a 4 1/2 daughter and a 2 1/2 son. They are pretty much treated the same as the daycare kids.

The toys they do not want to share ( and I dont want getting ruined ) stay in their room - daycare kids are not allowed to go into their rooms, which is fine because its on the top floor and we dont use that floor for daycare except for naps.

They are all on the same schedule ( eating and naps ) and the rules are the same with them as they are with my dcks ( no hitting, running, jumping on furniture etc ) If I am outside with dcks, my kids need to be outside too.

The only thing I might do differently is give my daughter a different main course on her meals..she is a very picky eater like her daddy and I am a mom that would rather have her eat than not.

[tenderhearts]

When my kids were younger they did pretty much what the daycare kids did, however they did get some special priveledges, like maybe watcha movie in another room at nap/quiet time, not much when they were younger mainly because they wanted to do everything. As they got older gradually they got more priveledges well I wouldn't call them priveledges, just they didn't necessarily follow what the daycare kids did, and now they are 13 & 18 and they "help" me at times mainly my 18 yr old daughter but obviously they don't do what they do::
Oh and most of their toys was kept seperate, they just weren't allowed to bring them out during daycare hours to play with in front of the other kids. I never had issues with my kids ever during my daycare years.