WWYD? Family (Friends) Debating Policies

**EAP** · 09-03-2013, 09:46 AM

don't change your policy for them or they will always push the issue no matter how long they are there for or what the policy is.

**Play Care** · 09-03-2013, 09:57 AM

Originally posted by EAP

don't change your policy for them or they will always push the issue no matter how long they are there for or what the policy is.

I would probably tell them "Sally, my policies are the same for all clients, I've found it leads to trouble otherwise. I'd love to care for Susie, but understand if you need to go elsewhere."
Put it back on her.

**JenNJ** · 09-03-2013, 10:14 AM

"All of my contracts are the same. Unfortunately, I can't take little Sally without a contract. I can't have different contracts for different clients. I understand totally if you need to find other care and there will be no hard feelings. After all, this is business situation."

**butterfly** · 09-03-2013, 10:17 AM

I would tell them that it's not going to work out. My policies are non-negotiable. I wouldn't feel bad about telling that either.

**Blackcat31** · 09-03-2013, 10:23 AM

Originally posted by Emsdayhome

Hi ! WWYD , I have a friend who is going back to work temporarily. She'll be full time for 4 months, and her daughter will be attending daycare here, knowing full well she is only full time for 4 months. No big deal, I'm ok with helping a friend out. She tell me yesterday that her and hubby are ok with contract and policies EXCEPT: they don't want to pay for sick days, they don't want to pay for vacation days (I take partial fee for a week, and no pay for one, over the course of a year- families have the same treatment with fees for THEIR vacay) and they don't want to pay for stat holidays.

So....how would I treat this one?? I'm already going out on a limb for them, and I think they're wonderful and their baby is amazing. We're quite good friends, but at what point do you say " wait a minute, this is a business not a charity" ...... I'm just not sure how to go about this. I won't even be taking vacation while their daughter is in my care...she's only here till Feb!

As a parent, I would ABSOLUTELY want to pay my provider-friend those "extras" because I am getting the assurance that my friend is caring for my child.....can't get better than that other than leaving your child with family...kwim?

NO WAY would I waive policies rules for a friend...especially a temporary one.

As a matter of fact, I'd be a little upset that they even asked me considering you are offering them something most families don't get.

**NeedaVaca** · 09-03-2013, 10:29 AM

No way would I change my policies! I would be insulted that a "friend" would ask me to do that...please stick to your policies

**MamaBearCanada** · 09-03-2013, 10:30 AM

"Sally my contract is non-negotiable. No hard feelings if you need to find somewhere else for Susie. I'd absolutely love to take her but if those things are deal breakers this isn't the right fit for you."

If you compromise you'll end up resentful. Also, if you change one policy be prepared for them to challenge all your policies that don't work for them.

I didn't have time for... But you don't mind feeding/dressing/bathing do you?

She's only a little sick and I knew as a friend you'd understand...

You don't kind if I pay you on xday instead do you?

I might be a little bit late getting Susie. Can you watch her an extra hour as a favor?

**Familycare71** · 09-03-2013, 10:42 AM

Wow! I would be so mad if someone tried this- especially a friend!!! I agree with other posters- please don't change a thing! I also like putting it back to her- hope this all works out ok for you!!!

**snbauser** · 09-03-2013, 10:59 AM

I completely agree with all the pp. I would say that in order for you to be able to care for her, then it needs to be by the business and those rules are the same for all.

**Memc2001** · 09-03-2013, 11:02 AM

Originally posted by Emsdayhome

Hi ! WWYD , I have a friend who is going back to work temporarily. She'll be full time for 4 months, and her daughter will be attending daycare here, knowing full well she is only full time for 4 months. No big deal, I'm ok with helping a friend out. She tell me yesterday that her and hubby are ok with contract and policies EXCEPT: they don't want to pay for sick days, they don't want to pay for vacation days (I take partial fee for a week, and no pay for one, over the course of a year- families have the same treatment with fees for THEIR vacay) and they don't want to pay for stat holidays.

So....how would I treat this one?? I'm already going out on a limb for them, and I think they're wonderful and their baby is amazing. We're quite good friends, but at what point do you say " wait a minute, this is a business not a charity" ...... I'm just not sure how to go about this. I won't even be taking vacation while their daughter is in my care...she's only here till Feb!

NO CONTRACT, NO CARE. You should tell her to go somewhere else if you want to keep her as a friend. I have lost (and gained) friendships over the years watching friend's kids. I don't do it anymore.

**Laurel** · 09-03-2013, 11:38 AM

Originally posted by Emsdayhome

Hi ! WWYD , I have a friend who is going back to work temporarily. She'll be full time for 4 months, and her daughter will be attending daycare here, knowing full well she is only full time for 4 months. No big deal, I'm ok with helping a friend out. She tell me yesterday that her and hubby are ok with contract and policies EXCEPT: they don't want to pay for sick days, they don't want to pay for vacation days (I take partial fee for a week, and no pay for one, over the course of a year- families have the same treatment with fees for THEIR vacay) and they don't want to pay for stat holidays.

So....how would I treat this one?? I'm already going out on a limb for them, and I think they're wonderful and their baby is amazing. We're quite good friends, but at what point do you say " wait a minute, this is a business not a charity" ...... I'm just not sure how to go about this. I won't even be taking vacation while their daughter is in my care...she's only here till Feb!

"I'd love to watch little Sally but I have never changed a contract for anyone. Sorry. All the daycares I know of around here charge for these days the same as I do. If you'd rather look around instead of making a decision right now, my feelings won't be hurt if you find something that you feel more comfortable with."

Laurel

**MyAngels** · 09-03-2013, 11:44 AM

I suppose you could charge her a drop-in rate that's significantly higher than your normal daily rate

. If I even did drop-in care (I don't) I'd charge double my normal rate.

Personally, when it comes to pay, it's my way or the highway around here

.

**e.j.** · 09-03-2013, 11:52 AM

I agree with everyone else. If your policies conflict with what she wants, she needs to look elsewhere. Someone's not going to be happy in this situation. It might as well be her!

**julie** · 09-03-2013, 12:38 PM

A true friend would value the policies you've set and respect your business.

Therefore, I'd probably tell her that it probably is best to keep business and friendship separate as you treat all your clients the same way and cannot change policies for certain clients. I wouldn't care for her kid now.

If she has the guile to ask this of you, then she is not valuing the favor you are doing for her.

WWYD? Family (Friends) Debating Policies