DCM Giving Me a Baby Shower

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I guess I just don't understand the underlined - because no one has mentioned throwing you a shower, that must mean they don't care about you?:confused:
Usually after the second baby is born people will stop by (usually bearing gifts) but most assume you have what you need for baby.

Bingo!
I celebrate every child that is born and so do many others. You don't need a baby shower to celebrate a child. That just seems a little bit entitled, in my personal opinion.
Around here, "sip and see" parties are popular for every baby after #1. You come and meet the child after they're born and celebrate with the mother. Gifts can be brought but no registry is made.

I don't see anyone being mean either.

[Unregistered]

Can also be a cultural thing. Some cultures do not believe in giving gifts until after the baby is born. In the Chinese culture there is a celebration when the child turns one month old.

[TheGoodLife]

A baby shower should be a happy thing- Im glad your DCM and friend are thinking of you and that you have a wonderful shower!! :hug:

I just received an invitation for a baby shower. The registry information was included on the actual invite along with the registry cards. I looked up the registry and the couple has registered for a $400 crib, $200 changing table, $150 play gym, etc. etc. There was *nothing* on the registry under $50 and this is, unfortunately, common.

On this note, though, I agree- I can't stand when a registry is filled with expensive things- makes me a bit angry that a person would expect those sorts of things. That's for close family to maybe chip in to provide, or the expecting parents, IMO!

[Blissful Kids]

Wow, I guess I opened a can of worms on this whole baby shower thing! Thank you to those of you who have congratulated me and shown your support. It's not that I feel "entitled" to a baby shower. I just enjoy them and think they are fun. I've never had a baby shower with any of my three kids. My first son was born shortly after we moved to a new city and I didn't have many friends, and my second was another boy so I guess no one thought to give me one. I did receive several gifts after he was born though. And my parents have been more than generous to us in helping out with things for our kids. (Not that we can't provide on our own, they have just enjoyed helping us along the way.) When someone mentioned giving me a shower for my baby girl I was excited! It is common where I live to have smaller showers for the second and third child. I think you described it perfectly:


[QUOTE=MarinaVanessa;356408]I think that you should have asked DCM first about whether it was okay to pass her info on to your friend. Other than that detail I don't see what the big deal is. Who knows, maybe DCM appreciates you so much she wanted to do something nice because she thought no one else would but she may feel grateful to have help or even to not have to handle it at all afterall if your friend steps in (being that she's busy). She asked, she offered, nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with your friend helping out either.

The DCM is very appreciative and thoughtful in planning parties and giving baby showers. I explained to her that I do have friends, but they are all mothers of young kids whose lives are crazy, and they probably just didn't think about it. (Although in my friends text she did say that she'd been thinking about it.) I am just going to wait it out and see if DCM says anything else about it, or see if my friend emails her. I'll see my friend this weekend too. If nothing comes of it, then that is ok. I don't want to be the one to take the initiative and seem rude or pushy. No matter what gifts I get (if any), big or small I will be grateful!

[DAYCAREPROVIDER242]

I have never received a baby shower. With my 2nd child, a girl from work (actually a couple girls) got a group together and said your baby shower is on such and such date at work . I thought it was weird but I was excited anyone wanted to do anything for me, especially since I didn't ask or even bring it up. When that day came, there was no shower. Nothing. I felt pretty crappy and forgotten. I figured if you say you're going to do it, do it.

As far as gifts are concerned, I don't go to anything because I do feel like sometimes it is all about the gifts. Not trying to be rude, but parents in my children's classes, for example, whom I know do not like me or even acknowledge my existence when I say a mere hello; they send invites to their children's birthdays and expect me to come to them, but the times I have tried to get to know them or invite them over to my house, we get stood up. I feel like they ONLY invite my kids is because either they have to (if they invite one kid, invites all rule @ school) or they just want us to bring them stuff.

I feel that baby showers should not be brought up by the pregnant person, but that if someone says they'll throw one for you, they should honor that. Registries are silly and I would not/never have used them.

[littlemissmuffet]

Wow it shocks me how some people on here feel about baby showers. So if you're against giving gifts at baby showers, are you against bridal showers, kids' birthday parties, and gifts at Christmas too?!

We celebrate actual births and birthdays (usually without gifts). We do not celebrate Christmas or participate in any kind of showers.

Maybe it's because I'm pregnant with my 2nd and it's a different gender than my first, but I was hoping to have a shower this pregnancy just because I don't have anything for a boy at all.

You were hoping to have a shower JUST becayse you don't have anything for a boy? Did the thought not occur to you to go and buy items for your boy?

I don't have anyone close in my life anymore, so no one's offered. I think that's what saddens me more than not having one and getting free stuff.

I would certainly hope that not having close family and friends would be more sad than not getting free stuff. You THINK? :confused:

I thought I had family and friends that cared, but considering I have 11 weeks left and no one's offered I guess not.

Coming from someone who's parents tried to buy my love my whole life... I assure you, gifts and throwing people parties does not equal love. More often than not, I find people these days give gifts out of obligation and/or to "one up" others.

I am sorry that you don't have close family or friends to help celebrate bringing your child into the world... but all that boy needs is you to celebrate him. :hug:

[LaLa1923]

We celebrate actual births and birthdays (usually without gifts). We do not celebrate Christmas or participate in any kind of showers. ::

You don't celebrate Christmas??!!:confused:

[littlemissmuffet]

[/B]

You don't celebrate Christmas??!!:confused:

Nope - not traditionally anyways. Hubs and I are atheists Before our daughter was born, Christmas to us was a quiet day to sleep all day and have nobody on the outside world bother us
Now, we have a Chirstmas baby... so we will celebrate her birthday on Christmas

[missjenny]

[/B]

You don't celebrate Christmas??!!:confused:

I don't either.

I think Christmas is the day that Jewish, Muslims, Hindu, Atheist (as well as all the other non Christian groups) sleep in late, go to the movies and have Chinese food.

[My3cents]

I think baby showers are wonderful, they celebrate the new baby to be, and all babies are special no matter what order they arrived in. I think it is only something else if it is made to be something else. I do because I want to do, and I hope others are like this and not for some other reason/motive. I take great time to pick out something for someone else for any special occasion.

What I think is sad, is people that don't get to experience these great events that would love them. I also think it is sad when it becomes something it should not be, like trying to outdo the next person or when someone expects it because they want free.

I see these little special events as tokens of love- not replacements of love but just an honoring and celebration of a special event.

I think the traditional ways of doing them are gone by and by and more up to date ways of doing them are appropriate now, just as not wearing white on your wedding is appropriate etc...... today it is fine to celebrate all children and not just the first born and usually after the first diapers are very welcomed. Sip and see's are fun for after the baby is born. As far as a registry goes, it is a wish list it is not the end all. I never look at them as I like to get creative with my choices or practical, depending on the person I am giving too, and my mood.

The three kings showered baby Jesus birth so WHY NOT and if your not for this type of thing......SO WHAT, that is ok too.lovethis

I think for most people it is more about getting together and anticipating the birth or after seeing the child and celebrating.