I'd Love Opinions On This - PG DCMS

[DCMomOf3]

I have 2 pg dcms, due at about the same time. DCM1 told me a few weeks ago and DCM2 told me today. Both want to use me but I only have one spot. I haven't commited to DCM1 but having known about hers longer the talk has been leaning toward her getting the spot. I would rather keep DCM2's kids for a few reasons, one being DCP1 are much more critical and accusing, are friends, and DCK1 lives in a different school district and could go to Pre-k at the school next year (I've had DCK1 longer than DCK2).

I haven't signed anything with either mom yet regarding the new babies. When do you consider yourself committed, and what kind of priority do you give to families?

[caitlin]

I've never been in this situation but I would go with the family I got along with better. I'd pull her aside and tell her that she would be given the spot if she wanted it. If there were a chance you thought she might back out then I would require her to comit to X amount of time. Then I would tell the other family you will be full unless someone else drops out, I'd make sure to give them enough time to arrange for different care but not too much time. You don't want them to pull out as soon as they find something new.

[meli829]

I usually give priority to my current families for spots that open up over those on my waiting list, but since in your case both families are currently with you, you have to base your decision on something more. I would choose the second family just because they seem to be better for you overall. Also, because you didn't actually tell dcm #1 that you were for sure giving her the spot, you can choose whoever you want.

Another thing to ask yourself is what family would you hate to lose the most? In case the mom would take her other dck out if there wasn't room for her other dck, so they could go to the same daycare.

[sahm1225]

I agree with the previous post and give it to the family you get along with the best. I am not sure how soon they are due, but if it's further away, I wouldnt have the discussion about guaranteeing a spot with either one. There is just way too much that can change in 3+ months (kids move, start school, etc.). Good luck

[QualiTcare]

just be careful -

i took 2 kids because i was friends with the mom for ten years so when she SWORE she wanted me to keep them, etc. i stopped advertising for spots because her two kids put me at my max.

after about one month, things changed - one of her kids started staying with his dad on a regular basis and she put her other child in a center because she found someone that would pick him up after the center closed and what she paid the center + the person combined was equal to what she paid me - and she got more hours of care. of course, the center was a horrible place and the person she found to pick him up was a stranger - but still. money is all that matters to some people.

i was annoyed that i had stopped advertising based on the fact that we were friends and i liked her - because it left me trying to fill two spots. think about your future cus you're the only one who will.

[tymaboy]

If it were me it would be whom ever paid a holding fee 1st. I have heard of some parents not paying for the spot then backing out at the last minute after the provider could have fill the spot a few times over.

[TGT09]

I have my PG clients sign a contract AND put down a deposit. I would make them seperate contracts from the children already in care. You could even change some wording around so that it's strictly about soon-to-be children.

As for picking, my gut tells me to tell you to go with the one that will be staying longer and that you get along with better. However, you said your friends with the others and you'll likely lose that friendship if you don't choose her. So, it's up to you whether you want to lose that. I don't care for friends kids for this exact reason. Sticky, sticky! Good luck!

[missnikki]

Let fate decide, and give it a little help- tell mom2 that you need a financial commitment right away since there are 2 fams talking about the same spot. Then the next day or whatever, tell mom1. See who ponies up first.