Eating Question

[Country Kids]

How in the world do you enforce the 1 bite/2 bite/thank you bite rule? I have one that absolutely refuses vegetables and will not eat them for anything.

Today I made up these cute yogurt/fruit cups for our dessert. I can't withhold it though because that is the fruit component of the meal.

So should I just not bother with it and know every day they won't eat vegies but will still get the yummy thing at the end of the meal?

[Willow]

I'm not one to play the power struggle rule game, I think it only makes things worse in the end.

I'd cut out all of your wonderful effort and go plain raw on the fruit for a long time - until the kiddo gets on board with veggies or they age out of your care, which ever comes first.

For picky's I go all out for veg offering them frozen, steamed with butter, dripping in cheese, cut in super fun shapes, I'll spring for novel colors (orange peppers, yellow beans etc), offer every dip imaginable.....but apples, bananas, oranges - PLAIN.

If you've got a kiddo who refuses veggies altogether you can even go so far as to limit your fruit variety too (I've done this temporarily on the advice of my food rep). You have to offer fruit of course, but there is no rule on how many kinds or what you have to do to make them enticing. Bananas day after day for breakfast in the end will get old. So will apples for lunch. But pair that with with a new and awesome veg every day, that alone will be enough to get the toughest of kids at least thinking about trying them.

You could also go the other route completely and challenge both food groups completely.....think whatever fruits are not at all typical for you to serve....plantains, mangoes, plums, prunes, starfruit etc. If challenging themselves with new fruits turns out ok perhaps they'll be more confident when challenging themselves with the veg.

I'm also a big fan of "dessert" when I run across a picky kid. I only reward dessert to "clean platers" and all the kids know this. Dessert may be something like half a baked apple with cinnamon and raisins, or a piece of fresh baked bread with raspberry preserves. Doesn't have to be unhealthy, just something with some zing that you don't have everyday. Everyone sits at the table together until the meal is over so clean platers can and do eat their "desserts" in front of the picky's. That's by far been the best inspiration for them. They see everyone else not making a fuss, eating well and being rewarded for doing so. They on the other hand get NO attention from me what so ever.

I had one kiddo once who fought tooth and nail to make food a giant ordeal and hated that I wouldn't play that game. He obviously used it as a way to get attention at home and even barter "miss J, I don't eat cucumbers"....miss J....miss J........miss J did you hear me I won't eat cucumbers....I've never eaten cucumbers" -or- "if I eat one bean can I watch a movie?" "if I take one more bite can I have a cookie? I only have to eat one more bite to get oreos at home" I'd either ignore the ridiculousness or answer with a plain "that's fine" or "nope" then with a sickening amount of cheeriness in my voice ask the clean plater next to him what color fruit juice pop they'd like for eating so well proceeding to ask her if it's as delicious as it looks as she slurps away next to him.

He cut the bologna in less than a week and started knocking out clean plates within a matter of a month. His mother still doesn't believe when I tell her all he eats here because they continue to indulge his games at home.



See what happens after you throw some kiwi on their plate (points for being weird and green just like many veg!) and save your cute fruit/yogurt cups for clean platers dessert!

[nothingwithoutjoy]

I'm not on the food program anymore, in part because I like to mess with things a bit to get kids to eat the healthier stuff! So that may give me more freedom than you have. A few things that work for me:

--serve a vegetable several times in one week. When they see it again and again, it gets very familiar, and they're more likely to try it

--don't serve bread at lunch if you've got super-picky eaters; they'll fill up on it and not try the veggies. I often do grains at breakfast and snacks, but skip them and have a veggie-full lunch. If they're hungry, they'll have to eat some veggies. I have no worries that kids today won't get enough grains!

--don't serve fruit at lunch; serve two veggies instead. Save fruit for snacks.

--cover food they love with stuff they won't try: my biggest hit is popcorn with butter and powdered kale (dried kale powdered in the blender). I don't go for "hiding" veggies. I'm more like "we're having popcorn with kale today--yay!" Then maybe they'll eat the kale alone later.

I always say "I expect you to try one bite" or "we always try one bite of everything," but I try not to get into a power struggle about it. I just keep saying it, and hope that eventually it sinks in (though I have to admit, sometimes I want to just put the offending food in their mouth for them). I don't believe in forcing children to eat or rewarding/punishing children for what they eat. My strategy is tell them my expectation (over and over and over) and serve so many healthful things, they have no choice but to eat them at some point.