Providers With Their Own Infants - How On Earth Do You Do It?

[AfterSchoolMom]

I'm fortunate enough to be able to take some time off now that our baby is here. I was hoping to get back to childcare this month - however, now I think I'll stick with my original plan and wait until the new year.

I've seen lots of threads here about providers taking off only a few days or two weeks and then getting right back into it. My question to you is, HOW on earth do you do it? My little one is five weeks old now, and I'm exhausted! We're not getting any sleep, and I'm constantly tending to his needs. I can't imagine having him plus a house full of littles!!

I think I'm definitely going back to SA's for January if I can swing it. That may be all I can handle.

[MaritimeMummy]

I honestly just too one day at a time, and only did one child part-time until my son was 7 months old.

He was a very high maintenance baby and had colic. Thank goodness my daughter was so self-sufficient at 2, and the DCG i had then was, too. And they played great together. If it wasn't for that, I would not have been able to do it.

(even now, my son is 16 months and is still the most demanding child out of my group. 3 DCKs and two of my own...I can legally have 6 total but my son is worth two kids, haha.

[DaycareMomma]

I'm a bit nervous about coming back after only 6 weeks off, especially since I'll have not only my 6 week old but a 5 month old as well. Lord grant me the patience to do it!

[Country Kids]

This is why I have never taken infants. My youngest to take is 2.

I didn't want to be juggling two babies, have two crying at the same time, diapers, eating, not sleeping, things like that.

It wasn't easy but it was alot easier then having more then one baby. We probably watched a little more tv/outdoor time but we made it and I'm on my 17th year!!!!!

Maybe start off with 1 then a month or two later add another one and then keep doing it this way and you can get use to the change gradually instead of all at once.

[SilverSabre25]

luck?

Honestly, it was the hardest thing ever but we had no choice. My families were largely annoyed with me taking one week off and I lost one family over it actually.

DS turned out to be very mellow and easy-going, which helped immensely. He was well-used to the noise and chaos and as a tiny newborn was able to fall asleep in the room with everyone, then I would leave them for a moment to go lay him in his bed for a nap. As he got older, the group changed and I was able to build in times when I could focus on just getting him down for naps while they played nearby.

A bit more TV than I liked but it got us through and it was all okay.

[cheerfuldom]

I am in the crazy minority that takes multiple infants...When my third was born, I had her plus two daycare kids under 1 plus my older two daughters plus other daycare kids. I was crazy busy but it was doable. The only reason why I termed one of the daycare babies (she was around 9 or 10 months) was because her cry was just so irritated. She really wasnt crying that much but I decided to downsize and that was the one to go.

My rule now (for myself....I am legally unlicensed) is ONE daycare child under 12 months at a time. I am 33 weeks pregnant. When my fourth child is born, this is what I will have:

My kids will be almost 5, 3.5, 18 months, newborn (the oldest is in part time preK)

My daycare kids will be 3.5, 3.5, almost 3, 2, 9 months (they are not all hear at the same time. It is normally three or four daycare kids here at a time)

My last maternity leave was 2 weeks but I was actually working part time after 1 week because of an issue with my assistant. I felt great after my baby was born. WAY better than I had at the end of the pregnancy. I dont do "on demand" anything with my babies. I do nurse but i immediately get them on a routine and plan for them to be awake when the daycare kids nap. I use a lot of the tips from the books The Baby Whisperer and The Happiest Baby on the Block and have had a lot of success with that. Within probably 2 months, maybe three months, I have the babies waking only twice a night at consistent times. I have had a reflux baby before and yes, she was a lot more work and stress but I still did daycare within a couple weeks from her birth.

This is what works for me and frankly, what I have to make work for financial reasons. I would love to take more time off or have less kids but I make it work. I think a big part of it is getting your business in order before the baby arrives. I dont take any kids that demand more attention than my own newborn. I dont take criers, non nappers, or kids with troublesome parents. I also have an assistant that comes in two afternoons a week but she can come in more if I need her.

[Lyss]

I reopened my program when my daughter was 4 months (I had stopped for a few years prior) and I only accepted a few children to test the waters. I started with 2 2.5yr olds and then when she was 5 months I had someone I knew with a baby a week younger than her approach me about pt (3-4days a week) and I decided to take that infant on as well. The 2 year olds were great at playing together so even if I had to feed a baby or put one down for nap they were able to entertain each other. During infant nap times we do "quieter" or more focused activities (like painting, puzzles, felt board, potato heads...)

I will say it was a bit stressful at times, DC infant was a screamer for the 1st 2 months and my DD suffered from severe reflux so she wasn't great at sleeping or eating for awhile. I just took it day by day, eventually i got everyone's routine hammered out and things run great now, I've even added a 3 year old to the mix.

[jojosmommy]

My DD is about to turn 1 this month happyface (mixed emotions about that obv)!

I took off 2.5 weeks from ALL daycare kids. Then took 2 kids back for one week and then back to my full group (4 dck and my own 2). I was purposeful, intentional and planned about everything. Meals were pre planned, crafts etc were preplanned, everything was on auto pilot. I also had lots of 4 day weeks because of the season, oct-dec is a pretty busy time but gave me lots of already scheduled days off. I also paid a cleaner for a few weeks when I got back so I actually felt like that was a non issue.

I had
own newborn
5 month old dcg
16 month old dcg
2.5 yr own son
3 yr dcb
5 yr dcg (not in K)

Babies ate breakfast at 8, followed by diapers, then took AM naps from 9-10:30, diapers at 10:30, lunch at 11:30 bottles, diapers, and bed at 12:30 and then naps from 12:30-3. diapers and snacks. The big kids watched one show at lunch (like always) and did preschool while the babies were sleeping. They played like normal the remainder of the day.

My dd is HIGH need, has severe feeding issues etc. But I feel like nobody really struggled around here. I always fed, changed and etc on a pretty good rotation so I feel like I prevented those freak out "OMG the baby needs to be fed moments". And my dck were good about knowing the babies needs were met first, then I would have extra special time with the big kids.

Good luck.

[Crazy8]

I took off 2 weeks with the birth of each of my kids - it was a rough few months but we managed. I had a good group of dck's and parents knew we'd be taking it easy for a month or two after my time off. Having had 9 months to plan for it I purposely didn't take any young infants on during my pregnancy so that my youngest dck was probably at least 16-18m when my own were born. They played, we did do some slight tv watching during those first few weeks, I changed diapers and got them down for naps. That was about the extent of our days for a while but parents were fine with it as the alternative was me take longer off or them leave and find care elsewhere.

[JustMe]

I too am wondering how I will do it. I am due in a few months and I am already struggling with the dc baby I have (will be around 8 months when my own is born) plus 2 older dc kids who are very difficult to care for, plus my own 2 kids who are still at home. I hadn't planned on taking time off but it will be very rough if I try to maintain my current schedule of 50+ hours per week. What's more important: keeping the dc families happy or maintaining my sanity/health/wellbeing? That's kind of an obvious answer but I feel bad since I had told my families when I told them of my pregnancy that I didn't foresee me taking time off when I had the baby.

[crunchymama]

I remember those days well! The months after my daughter was born were by far the hardest, longest days I've ever had. DD was born on Sunday, home on Tuesday, back to work Wednesday. Financially we just couldn't afford a long maternity leave.
Each day was just a matter of getting as much done as I could. On the weekends I did as much cooking as I could and froze lots of meals and snacks and that helped so much. Planning ahead and organizing helped too. And my very best piece of advice is to get a baby carrier--I loved my sleepy wrap!

[cheerfuldom]

I too am wondering how I will do it. I am due in a few months and I am already struggling with the dc baby I have (will be around 8 months when my own is born) plus 2 older dc kids who are very difficult to care for, plus my own 2 kids who are still at home. I hadn't planned on taking time off but it will be very rough if I try to maintain my current schedule of 50+ hours per week. What's more important: keeping the dc families happy or maintaining my sanity/health/wellbeing? That's kind of an obvious answer but I feel bad since I had told my families when I told them of my pregnancy that I didn't foresee me taking time off when I had the baby.

Dont feel that something you said months ago has trapped you in a box where you are overworked and putting yourself in a bad situation right now. I would wait till a month or 6 weeks before baby is due and then decide who stays and who goes. There is nothing wrong with saying "Now that I am expecting my child within a few weeks, I realize that the current work schedule/number of kids/etc. is no longer the right fit for my family". I really think you will have a lot of regrets if you keep working too much and the situation takes away from your time with your newborn....you cant get that time back and I would hate for you to be frustrated with that choice

[cheerfuldom]

I remember those days well! The months after my daughter was born were by far the hardest, longest days I've ever had. DD was born on Sunday, home on Tuesday, back to work Wednesday. Financially we just couldn't afford a long maternity leave.
Each day was just a matter of getting as much done as I could. On the weekends I did as much cooking as I could and froze lots of meals and snacks and that helped so much. Planning ahead and organizing helped too. And my very best piece of advice is to get a baby carrier--I loved my sleepy wrap!

my word, back within a few days....goodness, I feel bad that you had to do that. but yes I agree, a good carrier makes a big difference!

[spud912]

I started daycare when my youngest was 6 weeks old, but I started small with 1 child, then added 1 more two weeks later. I stayed with my 2 children + the 2 dck's for several months and then added a 3rd. 3 months later I added a fourth dck (which is my allotted max). All of the dck's were 2+, except my older dd who was 20 months old when my younger dd was 6 weeks old.

I breastfed my dd, which I think helped tremendously because I could accommodate at any time. The only caveat was parents always seemed to pick-up/drop-off when I was conveniently feeding her or she needed to be fed, which I found to be pretty annoying. I started daycare in our mild season so my dd was able to go outside when we went. She was fairly colicky and temperamental and didn't take a nap longer than 20 minutes for months on end. To top it off, she had a voracious appetite and easily got frustrated with breastfeeding. When I started solids, she refused to let me feed her. Everything started to mellow out around 10 months because she started feeding herself, was cut down to 1 nap, and self-weened from breast milk. It wasn't easy, but it was definitely doable. Since she was my daughter and not a dck, I had no problem with letting her cry at times so I could get things done. You will get into the swing of things and before you know it, it will be over. I look back on those times fondly (despite never having a nap time break ).

[JustMe]

Dont feel that something you said months ago has trapped you in a box where you are overworked and putting yourself in a bad situation right now. I would wait till a month or 6 weeks before baby is due and then decide who stays and who goes. There is nothing wrong with saying "Now that I am expecting my child within a few weeks, I realize that the current work schedule/number of kids/etc. is no longer the right fit for my family". I really think you will have a lot of regrets if you keep working too much and the situation takes away from your time with your newborn....you cant get that time back and I would hate for you to be frustrated with that choice

Thanks for the advice. I know I would regret it if I didn't take time off, but why is it so hard to actually do it?! Growing a backbone is the hardest part of having a daycare .