One Crazy Week?

[daycare]

So as many of you know, I have some pretty high maintenance families. They are nice as pie, but have demands and expectations that are sometimes hard to swallow.

Well my program is based mostly outdoors. I require the DCP to have proper clothing and shoes each day or I send them right back out the door.

Well this week so far, I have had to send the same family out the door 2 times for not having proper shoes. Well yesterday one came in open toe and the other came in dress shoes. I was going to send them back out the door, but they were my last arrival and we were already loaded up in the car leaving for our field trip. So I did not send them back home for a 3rd day in a row. YOu would think that they would have not done this again for the 3rd time??????

My policy states closed toe tennis shoes or hiking boot only. A policy that I just sent out this past weekend, the week before and made a huge poster to hang on the back of my front door so they can see it every day when they leave.

this weeks events were, a trike-a-thon, paper boat race at the damn, hiking, leaf hunt and park play. So now you see why I have the shoe policy.

Well today DCM comes in and is very upset that one of her kids has massive blisters all over the feet. Just so happens to be the one that wore the dress shoes without socks. She tells me that DCK will need to have special attention to her feet today and will not be able to go on today's leaf hunt????? So I stand there looking and inspecting DCG feet. Yes mom is right, lots of blisters.

I tell DCM, I am sorry that this happened to her feet and this is why I have the shoe policy in place. I am not doing it to be a pain, I am doing it for the safety and well being of the kids. She stops me in mid sentence and says " so you are saying I am not a good mother for putting her in those shoes?" I tell her that I said no such thing and that I would take the fault for it, because I should have sent them home again and not allowed for her girls to go on the field trip with us yesterday. DCM then says, well maybe if you just hold her for most of the day she will do ok.

At this point I am frustrated with DCM. I then made it worse by telling her, if your child cannot participate as normal, she cannot be here today. I am feel that it is the parents fault, because despite several warnings, they refuse to follow policy. Of course mom says I cannot miss work for this, she needs to stay.

BTW this girl is 2.5 and weights about 55lbs. There is no way I could carry this kid around all day and even if she was not, I have 9 other kids here, there is no way I could/would carry a child around all day long.

So DCM leaves DCG and she is very angry, as am I. I did tell DCM before she left that if the child cannot keep up with us today, that I will have to cal a DCP to come and pick her up.

Am I being to over the top with this? Is my policy not realistic? Do you think that I am at fault for allowing them to stay in my care with the wrong shoes?

Advice please.....

[sharlan]

I think you are being realistic.

I really get upset over dress shoes without socks. Why can't the parents put socks on??? (BECAUSE they are lazy.)

I would tell the parents to leave an extra pair of shoes at your house, just in case.

[Willow]

You are definitely not wrong, and this is definitely not your fault.


But in the future I'd stick by my policies to the letter with this parent. If she bucks you can remind her of this incident to impress upon her why they are so important and why you will not give in.

[daycare]

thanks for both of your replies. Glad that someone else thinks that I am not out of line with my policies. I know that this is just going to be the start of this......UGH

Sharlan- The kids all do have back up shoes here, but the ones that this child has here no longer fits them and once again, my fault for not demanding that they have the right materials in their cubby box.

Willow- thanks good point. I can't let this family slip on a banana peel. Guess I need to turn on my backbone battery..

[e.j.]

You are not at fault, over the top or being unrealistic.

Let me get this straight......This woman enrolled her kids in your day care program knowing it's outdoor based. Your policy clearly states, "closed toe tennis shoes or hiking boot only". Today is Thursday so 3 out of 4 days this week, she brought her kids dressed in inappropriate footwear. Two out of those 4 days, she was sent home to change them and she still showed up on the 3rd day with kids dressed in sandals/dress shoes with no socks and now she's angry at you because one of her kids has blisters from those dress shoes? And...she expects you to carry her child around all day? You've got to be kidding?! No one can possibly be that thick!

It seems as though she is blatantly disregarding your policies. Today at pick up, I would hand her a copy of the handbook with your shoe policy highlighted. If you have something in there that states the child can't attend day care if unable to function normally/keep up with the others, I'd highlight that, too. Then, I would stress the fact that all day care policies are in the handbook for a reason and they must be followed for the safety and well being of everyone involved. If she can't follow your policies, she needs to find another day care for her kids. I have a lot of patience and rarely terminate care but when a parent's attitude is basically, "In your face"", I would feel the need to speak up and put an end to it quickly.

[daycare]

You are not at fault, over the top or being unrealistic.

Let me get this straight......This woman enrolled her kids in your day care program knowing it's outdoor based. Your policy clearly states, "closed toe tennis shoes or hiking boot only". Today is Thursday so 3 out of 4 days this week, she brought her kids dressed in inappropriate footwear. Two out of those 4 days, she was sent home to change them and she still showed up on the 3rd day with kids dressed in sandals/dress shoes with no socks and now she's angry at you because one of her kids has blisters from those dress shoes? And...she expects you to carry her child around all day? You've got to be kidding?! No one can possibly be that thick!

It seems as though she is blatantly disregarding your policies. Today at pick up, I would hand her a copy of the handbook with your shoe policy highlighted. If you have something in there that states the child can't attend day care if unable to function normally/keep up with the others, I'd highlight that, too. Then, I would stress the fact that all day care policies are in the handbook for a reason and they must be followed for the safety and well being of everyone involved. If she can't follow your policies, she needs to find another day care for her kids. I have a lot of patience and rarely terminate care but when a parent's attitude is basically, "In your face"", I would feel the need to speak up and put an end to it quickly.

yes you are reading that right.....had to go home 2 times and brought wrong shoes a third time. The worst part is that I just did everything you said in regards to my PHB..... just a few days ago........... It is even posted in my house...

I have actually termed everyone in my DC before except two kids because I was dealing with a ton of high maintenance mary's.

I will say this. Normally this family is a delight, I don't know what is going on with them and why they are just being a total BUTT, but if the keep it up, I am going to be watching their butt's walk down my sidewalk for one last final time.

As I said before, I know that this is just the start of it....We just go back in and DCG screamed for almost 30min at the park becuase it hurts her to walk. I tired to pull her around in the wagon, but she wanted out, don't blame the poor girl. I tired to show her to crawl around, but that didnt work.........UGH

[daycarediva]

oh heeccckkk no!

I would tell her that she NEEDS to have a SPARE pair of sneakers that fit to reain at your house to avoid this problem in the future. Something along the lines of "To prevent further injury to DCG's feet and to allow her to be able to fully participate I would appreciate you purchasing a pair of sneakers this weekend to bring in Monday and stay in DCG's cubby." Thanks!

I had to do this with a parent recently and I KNOW it's going to come up when snow falls again. Yes I know it WILL be 58* but right NOW it's 40 and we need to go outside.

[daycare]

oh heeccckkk no!

I would tell her that she NEEDS to have a SPARE pair of sneakers that fit to reain at your house to avoid this problem in the future. Something along the lines of "To prevent further injury to DCG's feet and to allow her to be able to fully participate I would appreciate you purchasing a pair of sneakers this weekend to bring in Monday and stay in DCG's cubby." Thanks!

I had to do this with a parent recently and I KNOW it's going to come up when snow falls again. Yes I know it WILL be 58* but right NOW it's 40 and we need to go outside.

I did email her putting my foot down. DCG screamed all through lunch time how bad her feet hurt until about 5 min ago. Gma just came and picked both DCK up. I do feel bad for DCG, and can't help but want to kick myself in the butt for not turning them away a third time.

I also told her that she has until Monday to purchase shoes that meet policy. I told her if I did not have the back up shoes by Monday that I would consider them giving notice without refund.

NO I am just sitting here waiting to see what she is going to say.oh and I was a lot nicer than what I typed above.....

[Country Kids]

Have you ever thought about having everyone bring a pair of rubber boots to leave at your house?

I do this and it has worked wonders!!!!! We just store them in a little mesh basket by the door and then when we are going outside/walking/field trip on go our boots. They aren't allowed to go home with the child at all.

This next spring I'm going to take the outgrowns ones and plant flowers in them and place them around the flower beds-

[daycare]

Have you ever thought about having everyone bring a pair of rubber boots to leave at your house?

I do this and it has worked wonders!!!!! We just store them in a little mesh basket by the door and then when we are going outside/walking/field trip on go our boots. They aren't allowed to go home with the child at all.

This next spring I'm going to take the outgrowns ones and plant flowers in them and place them around the flower beds-

well heres the thing. each quarter, I send out PHB reminders, we replace old clothing/shoes. We replace anything necessary so that the DCKs can remain comfortable here and safe. Looks like this families stuff slipped through the cracks and I did not realize that the shoes did not fit until it was too late...

Rubber boots give blisters when the kids hike if they don't fit them right. We hike at least 1x 2x week............

UGH today blows.and now I have a kid with explosive diaper.........................lmao ugh what did I doooooooooooooo help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Im gonna jump..

[e.j.]

I did email her putting my foot down. DCG screamed all through lunch time how bad her feet hurt until about 5 min ago. Gma just came and picked both DCK up. I do feel bad for DCG, and can't help but want to kick myself in the butt for not turning them away a third time.

Poor kid! Please don't blame yourself. As a parent, I can't imagine dropping my kid off at day care knowing she had so many blisters and how much pain she was in!

Hindsight is 20/20. You were just trying to deal with a situation she created in the best way you could at the time. You have nothing to feel guilty about.

I also told her that she has until Monday to purchase shoes that meet policy. I told her if I did not have the back up shoes by Monday that I would consider them giving notice without refund.

NO I am just sitting here waiting to see what she is going to say.oh and I was a lot nicer than what I typed above.....

Good for you! happyface