Not Getting Along!

[safechner]

I just started to watch new family two weeks ago (ages of 7 and 15mo). I only watch one daycare girl who is 7 years old every other week. My problem is, my 7 years old daughter and daycare girl are NOT getting along. She was so mean to my daughter but I told my daughter to ignore her so she will move on. However, she keeps talk back to her like she said, "you are rude I ever have" or "you lied" blah, blah. I keep tell her not to talk back to her. Both of them are getting worst if they keep arguing. I make them sit on the couch to talk to them but my daughter kept talk back to me when I said ya'll must be nice each other. Both of them are very different, I guess. I looked at a 7 year old dcg so I think she probably didn't realized she is mean or that is the way she is. Her mother told me that she always drama.. It drives me crazy when they are not getting along. She likes to blame my daughter but I know what she was doing. I told my daughter not to worry about that but she needs to move on to play something else or going to friend's house or whatever.

Dcg is totally different like for example, we went to library to have storytime for 1 grades through 6 grades today. She don't want to do anything with that storytime but my daughter loves to go. Her mother told me that she loves to read book but to me she seems don't. I don't know what is her problem. It is not my fault that she didnt go in since she said she is boring for waiting 45 mins for them to come out from storytime room. I keep asked if she can go back to that storytime but she said no or read some books that she likes but she said no. What should I do?

[safechner]

Update

I would need some advice. This week, I am watching 7 years old as a same ages of my second daughter. Both of them are still not getting along but I am trying to figuring it out what I can for them. My daughter told me that she hates her and hate our house because of her. She didnt do anything to her at all but I don't know what is her problem. I keep telling my daughter to walk away if she keeps mean to her. My dc girl tried to blame on her that she is mean to her but that is not true since I caught her a few times. She thinks she is bossy and told my daughter "that is my job with her sister that she is not allowed to play with her 16 months old sister." How can I solve the problem with daycare girl? Last week, I watched her sister only and it was very nice, haha. Their mother and dc girl came here to pick her little sister so her sister was happy to see her sister and her sister got her but her mother got her off from her quickly which is strange to me. That happened twice and I asked her mother is it ok but she said yes it is ok. I dont understand why she would get her off from her.


Also, I am running out of idea to keep her busy during the day while she is here. She wouldn't want to play any games for example I explained to follow the rules how to play but she is easily give up and dont want t play, is not interested to go to story time in the library every Thursdays, etc.. All she will go to swimming or wants to watch the tv in my daughter's room. I only watch her every other week and I dont want to lose her sister that i am watching for a full time. Please help... I am at a loss...

[Janet]

That's a ****y situation...

I think that the time for trying to negotiate with the 7 year old should be finished. It seems like there's nothing that you can do to please her and honestly, at 7 she should be able to do story time without giving you problems. Here's an approach and I will warn you that it's tough, but it's an idea. Whenever she starts with the whining, or lying or "I'm bored" or anything along those lines, just ask her to go sit somewhere else and when she gets the bug out of her butt, then she can feel free to join the rest of you. Keep doing this until she realizes that her behaviors and attitudes have a negative impact. Just keep reminding her to check herself! Good luck!

[safechner]

I think that the time for trying to negotiate with the 7 year old should be finished. It seems like there's nothing that you can do to please her and honestly, at 7 she should be able to do story time without giving you problems. Here's an approach and I will warn you that it's tough, but it's an idea. Whenever she starts with the whining, or lying or "I'm bored" or anything along those lines, just ask her to go sit somewhere else and when she gets the bug out of her butt, then she can feel free to join the rest of you. Keep doing this until she realizes that her behaviors and attitudes have a negative impact. Just keep reminding her to check herself! Good luck!

Thanks for tip. I have decided that I am not going waste my time to ask her to have fun/active with us. I have tried a lot with her but if she dont want to then it is her problem. It was beautiful yesterday since my daughter finally ignored her when she tried to be mean to her. Of course, she was frustrated with my daughter but it seems work. I hope she will realize about her behaviors and attitudes like you said.

My husband and I believe she may have problems at home with her mother. At pick up, she was happy to see her 16 month old but she was not happy to see her 7 years old and gave her a fake hugs which is strange to me. A 7 year old dcg have different father what her sister have but she told me that she hates her father and she wanted to kill him. I believe she haven't seen her dad for a long time, who knows.