Toy Taker and Teaser

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  • Country Kids
    Nature Lover
    • Mar 2011
    • 5051

    Toy Taker and Teaser

    I have a child (my smallest and youngest) who is almost 3. This child will take a toy from the other kids and then hide it behind the back, put it above the head, what ever it takes so the other one can't get it back and teasing them. They are quick about it and the others just can't get the toy back. The child won't even give it back when I tell them to. Its only ends when I take the toy back.

    There is older siblings that I don't watch but it seems like this maybe where the child is learning it. The child just laughs and smiles while doing it. Like siblings would do. Anyway what would you guys do as if its being done at home the child doesn't understand why they can't do it to kids here. I'm getting the impression older siblings maybe teasing this one alot.
    Each day is a fresh start
    Never look back on regrets
    Live life to the fullest
    We only get one shot at this!!
  • Blackcat31
    • Oct 2010
    • 36124

    #2
    Personally I don't think it matters if it is or isn't ok somewhere else or if she is picking it up from someone else. It is NOT ok at your house.

    If I saw that happen, I would go over to the DCG and take the toy she is hiding. I would give it back to whomever she took it from and tell her "We do not play like that here"

    I would then separate her from that group of kids or from that child and have her find something else to do.

    Rinse and repeat until she realizes that she can't play that way at your house.

    If I had to repeat this too many times, I would probably resort to not only redirecting her to another activity but have her take a short time out away from everything, including the toys.

    Comment

    • Country Kids
      Nature Lover
      • Mar 2011
      • 5051

      #3
      I have did this for about the first month of summer and then the last month the time outs. Nothing is working! It seems to only be getting worse and then to make it even worse this is a screaming child when they are in time out. My neighbors just lovethis. Also, the child will go up to the child the gets the toy back (she seems to target only one) and then bites them. The thing is its always the biggest kid of the group (older 3 year old) and will wrestle the child down and then chop. Time out immediately but it seems like its getting worse.
      Each day is a fresh start
      Never look back on regrets
      Live life to the fullest
      We only get one shot at this!!

      Comment

      • Blackcat31
        • Oct 2010
        • 36124

        #4
        Sounds to me it is more of a control issue than a toy or sharing issue. The child apparently thinks they are in charge.

        I guess I would have them play alone until they are ready to try again. I would think a few days of playing alone might help. ??? I dunno, I have never had a kid be so stubborn before. Do the parents have the same issues too with this child or with sibling? Have you discussed any of this with them at all?

        FWIW~ When I say playing alone, I don't mean secluded. Out of sight and sound or any type of solitary confinement.

        I mean being allowed to play in group activities when the provider is able to shadow and intervene immediately but as play alone (without playmates) during free play when the provider is not directly involved.

        Comment

        • SilverSabre25
          Senior Member
          • Aug 2010
          • 7585

          #5
          I have one who is starting this behavior...she is 3.5 and her brother is 1.

          This is also my dcg that acts like you've smacked her in the face if you correct her behavior *at all* so correcting her is harrowing for me but I do it anyway. Explaining that that is teasing and it is NOT okay and we do NOT tease. Then she cries and I vacillate between hugging her and packing her in a shipping crate to Alaska.

          *sigh*

          I'm having a rough day
          Hee hee! Look, I have a signature!

          Comment

          • Country Kids
            Nature Lover
            • Mar 2011
            • 5051

            #6
            There is like a 5 year age difference between the siblings. Either older sibling is teasing this younger one or the younger one cries and the older one has to give their toys up.

            So I'm thinking when I give the toy back to the bigger child (not the sibling but the dck), the littler one is getting mad because they lose the toy here and they are retalliating by going up and biting the child.

            I know I've talked to the parents before on things and it seems like there is some teasing going on or the older one doesn't want the little one around their toys and such. Sibling fighting as usual but the little one doesn't get you can't do it do others.
            Each day is a fresh start
            Never look back on regrets
            Live life to the fullest
            We only get one shot at this!!

            Comment

            • countrymom
              Daycare.com Member
              • Aug 2010
              • 4874

              #7
              when I see this happening, I pluck it out of the hand of the stealer and give it back to the other child. I do it over and over, till they realize its not fun when its happening to them.

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