Screaming/crying all day

[Unregistered]

I had a 21 month old start here last month, she is now going on 22 months and been here about 5 weeks. When we first met with her family, she is an easy going, smart, funny little girl. She is talking in full sentences and likes to sing. That being said, she has never been away from her mom and dad. I went in expecting her to have trouble with good-bye, but instead the first week was awful. She spent the whole day SCREAMING and yelling. Nothing would help. She got to the point where she was hitting the youngest and almost pushed him down the stairs. (Thankfully I was right there) The LO did nothing at all to provoke this, mind you. She hasn't been hitting or anything since, but she still spends the entire day screaming/crying until nap and then again after she wakes up. It is getting so very exhausting. It is taking it's toll on me and the other kids in my care. My oldest son, who is 3.5 and very sensitive has actually started hiding when she gets dropped off because she is too loud for him. (His words) I have continued to try every thing I can to make her comfortable, distract her, involve her, but she would rather scream/cry. I just don't know what to do anymore. This is her first day of her 6th week here and it's still as bad as it was.. no progression. Please help.

[Heidi]

Ok...after 5 weeks, maybe some tough love is worth a try (it's either that or term, which is tougher).

Give her a semi-comfy spot away from the group, and very calmy take her hand and walk her there. Tell her "your crying hurts our ears. We really want you to play with us, but if you want to cry, you can do it here. When you're done crying, you can come play". Then, walk away.


Try that for 2 or 3 days. If she stops crying, invite her out, and make sure to give her lots of cuddles, etc. You're not trying to make her feel unwanted, but the drama is overload, right?

Maybe she you could hang a picture of her family or momma or whoever she's most bonded to on the OPPOSITE side of the room from the crying spot. That way, she has another choice besides crying...she can look at momma!

Or....

Could she have a picture of mom to carry around...provided she's not crying? I'm not sure if she's old enough for that, though....

[mbullette]

I would terminate but that is just me. If you are in your 6th week with her and things are not getting any better I dont see any change in the near future. Be honest with the parents and tell them things are not working out.

Good luck!!!

[Unregistered]

Ok...after 5 weeks, maybe some tough love is worth a try (it's either that or term, which is tougher).

Give her a semi-comfy spot away from the group, and very calmy take her hand and walk her there. Tell her "your crying hurts our ears. We really want you to play with us, but if you want to cry, you can do it here. When you're done crying, you can come play". Then, walk away.


Try that for 2 or 3 days. If she stops crying, invite her out, and make sure to give her lots of cuddles, etc. You're not trying to make her feel unwanted, but the drama is overload, right?

Maybe she you could hang a picture of her family or momma or whoever she's most bonded to on the OPPOSITE side of the room from the crying spot. That way, she has another choice besides crying...she can look at momma!

Or....

Could she have a picture of mom to carry around...provided she's not crying? I'm not sure if she's old enough for that, though....

I actually did make a picture book of all the kids for her (and the other kids) to bring home, and one to stay here. She would scream sooo loudly if anyone left, so she actually has started to ask for the picture. Maybe a picture of mom and dad would be helpful.

I unfortunately did start the "tough love" 2 weeks ago. Pretty much everything you said, it seemed to help the first couple days and then back to the screaming/crying again.

I agree that terming might be in the soon future if things don't turn around.. it's too much.. I feel so bad saying that. When she is calm and playing, she is such a joy to have around, but those times are not long/often.